I want to live, so what is living?
by AgentJKL
Summary: Reincarnation is seen as a second chance, but what is there to live for? With everything taken away from her, follow a young girl as she tries to find that answer. But how can she accomplish that task when she is given the card of certain death? Who knew the last thing a Naruto fan wanted was being reincarnated as an Uchiha… Will she survive or die as this second life takes a turn
1. Chapter 1: A Second Chance?

**I don't own any of the characters or cover. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto except my own OC and the cover belongs to 月森うさこ****. Please enjoy the story and support the official release…**

* * *

(A/N alright this is my first crack at an OC fic. I know theres a ton of these out there and there might be some similarities but I'll try to give this OC some depth. Honestly, I started this fic more out of a desire for a change of pace. I prefer writing romance so yeah... You know how well this is gonna turn out... As for the OC I guess she's kinda based off Ange from Cross Ange, Youko from Twelve Kingdoms, and me to some extent. Just be prepared to hate the OC as she stumbles around like a chicken without a head and wines like a baby for a bit. It gets better, I promise...)

* * *

**Chapter 1: A Second Chance Or A Cruel Joke?**

**3rd POV**

August 18 20XX

It was a raining in Tokyo that day. Perhaps it was to be expected, this was a tragic day for a certain family. "Today, we are here to remember the memories of Akane Hatori…" stated the priest as friends and family of the recently deceased looked on.

"What did sis do to deserve this? She just graduated from high school! She had a life to live!" bawled a young girl, who looked as if she was on middle school.

"I don't know… but I'm sure Akane is in a better place now…" replied the girl's mother as she watched the casket of her eldest daughter be lowered into the ground.

"Really?" asked the young girl who took her eyes off the coffin for the first time in hours.

"Yes, I'm sure she's looking over both of us right now…"

* * *

**Normal POV**

_Where am I? Was I dead? _I thought to myself looking around the darkness around me. I wanted to deny it. I wanted to believe this was all a bad dream. But the no matter how hard I try, my last moments haunted me like a lasting reminder...

I had just graduated from high school and got myself a job at bookstore. Admittedly, I did want to go to go to an arts school in America but my family didn't have enough money… I wasn't stupid by any means, but I certainly wasn't smart enough to get myself a scholarship. That was me, average. I didn't excel and I didn't lag behind, besides art of course. Although I couldn't really complain, the job was quite nice. I had nice pay, good coworkers and I think I was developing a crush on one of them. Plus, no need to work overtime, and I got to read all the manga I ever wanted. The only caveat, was the fact I had to clean up and lock the place up at 11pm. I thought I could handle a simple task like that. I wasn't the most responsible person but I could follow a few simple instructions. _Oh, how was I wrong…_

* * *

"What in the world do you want from me you psycho!" I screamed as the mad man with a knife in hand rushed towards me.

Not receiving an answer, I decided to make a run for it. I screamed for help, but in the dead of night no one was around to hear my cries for assistants.

_Damnit why did I have to accept the job?! Why didn't I just listen to mom and got that waitress job!_

As these thoughts flowed through my mind, I felt a sharp pain.

I was stabbed…

I collapsed to the pavement as the mad man continued to plunge his weapon into my body. The pain was excruciating as I felt him stab me thirteen more times. The first three were the worst things I've ever felt. Even more so than the car accident I found myself in at the tender age of eight.

"Argh! P-please STO-" I yelled but knew nobody heard me.

I didn't even think the psycho heard me either. Instead he just kept plugging his knife into my body. I tried to struggle, I really did, grabbed onto his wrists in fact. Unfortunately, I was a weak… both mentally and physically.

Soon, I found myself giving up, but I still tried struggling like the idiot I was. I was going to die, but I didn't want to die. Funny how human instincts worked… It was hopeless, but at the same time I hoped. I was screaming at the top of my lungs till I couldn't scream any longer. Still, in the depths of my mind, strength began to falter.

_Nobody was coming…_

_I can't fight this maniac…_

_I was already on deaths doors…_

Finally, it was those thoughts that broke the camels back. Moments later, the contested blade once again found itself lodged into my flesh. That, was when I gave up…

When the stabbing resumed, I could just feel the cold steel blade plunge in and out of my body once more. The sound of knife slicing through human meat rang throughout my ear… The pain was so distinct, I could count how many time that blade entered my body.

Eventually though, I could barely feel them… or anything else for that matter. As I lay dying, I thought to myself how could this happen? What did I ever do to deserve this? I guess I would never find out, as I died from blood loss shortly after.

* * *

And that is how the tragic tale of Akane Hatori came to a sudden end… Even now, I asked myself why? But nothing came to mind. I just wished I could have done more with my life.

I wanted to get married, move on from the bookstore, study in America, I don't know, maybe visit Europe at some point.

Still, why me of all people. Out of all the people in the world it just had to be me… Was I that unlucky? I didn't want to believe that, I refused to believe that. Was something so trivial as a dice roll in the game of life really what ended my play-through short. I wanted to cry, I wanted to punch something, kick something. I was mad, in denial.

"Doctor I think the baby is moving!" grunted a lady's voice past the darkness.

"That fine, it's completely normal. Just push!" cried another, presumably another woman.

Voices? Baby? Whats happening?

"Thats it, push! You're doing great." coached the woman.

I was completely lost until it dawned on me. This was child birth… Was I being reincarnated? Impossible, it's flat out impossible… Sure I've read plenty of novels and manga with a reincarnation scenario. But that was fiction… right?

But it didn't matter what I believed was fiction or not… it's actually happening.

looking up, I saw a light and every waking moment it got closer. The second my new 'mother' plopped me out, I immediately looked around. I wanted to know where I was, how much time had past, and everything else a reincarnated person would want to know. I knew I was somewhere in Japan because the doctor and mother spoke Japanese, but where.

_Why in the world is everything made out of wood? What time period am I in?!_

Everything from the floor to the roof was made of wood. Not the drab white walls I was so familiar with from modern Japan.

_Was I not in a hospital?_

Trying to calm myself down, I rationalized that I was born to a poor family in the countryside or this was a home birth. However, my hopes were dashed when I saw a certain tapestry hanging on a nearby wall.

_Oh no… _I thought to myself as my mind tried to comprehend what I was seeing.

The tapestry in question was of an Uchiha fan from Naruto…

Was I born into the world of Naruto?

No, impossible. That's something that would happen in fiction. No not even, this could only happen in something like fan fiction… Right?

Now, I crossed my mental fingers that my family was just a Naruto fanatic. Enough of one that they were crazy enough to hang something like the tapestry in their living room. I was just a normal girl born to a maybe not so normal family in the country side. I was definitely not where I thought I was.

"Congratulations it's a beautiful baby girl, do you have a name?" asked the doctor handing me over to my new mother.

The second I saw her sweaty and exhausted face, my mind went to one word that described my situation.

_Why…_

I really wanted to curse, believe me. But I just couldn't bring myself too… I just felt so defeated right now.

"Yes, her name is Aya. Aya Uchiha," smiled my new mother as her eyes swirled with the Sharingan.

_Why did this have to happen to me! _I thought to myself as I began the closest thing a baby could to hyper ventilating.

I was having a panic attack…

This was bad. First, I was placed in the Naruto world! A place where murder and death is common place! Second…

_I was going to die. Just like last time, I was going to die… I might not even die from a knife. I was going to be blown to smithereens by a paper bomb! Or I was going to be decapitated by a wire trap! Or worse, I could be burned alive by fire ninjutsu! This reincarnation is just some cruel sick joke…_

"Doctor what's happening!" cried a younger voice but I was barely paying attention anymore.

"I'm not quite…" started the doctor but at this point I was just concentrating on breathing.

_I was going to die again…_

* * *

(A/N Okay I'll admit this was pretty standard and uncreative. But at the very least you get some idea of what this OC will be like for a bit, a really sarcastic pessimist. Just stick around for the next three chapters and hopefully I'll sway some opinions. BTW the Uchiha are still screwed in this fic. Don't expect this OC to change anything anytime soon, not until the start of part one...)

Last edit: November 18, 2019


	2. Chapter 2: A New Life?

**I don't own any of the characters or cover. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto except my own OC and the cover belongs to 月森うさこ****. Please enjoy the story and support the official release…**

* * *

(A/N so another update... I really should be doing my HW right now, but you know that nagging feeling you get? Yeah, I'm feeling that now so lucky you guys, there's a new chapter. I haven't been in this fandom for long but it's really is competitive. Anyhow, not much plot development in this chapter, just a bunch of set up and introductions. By the way, if you wanted Itachi romance or Shisui romance, prepared to be disappointed. There is a reason I tagged this as friendship... I said I liked writing romance, but I started this story specifically to take a break from that stuff. Maybe sometime in the future, but definitely not now so don't hold your breaths)

* * *

**Chapter 2: A New Life Or Renewed Regrets?**

**Normal POV**

**3 years later**

Alright, I might have over exaggerated. Life in the world of Naruto wasn't the death sentence I thought it would be and the initial panic wore off after the first few months. The first month I could barely stand being here, I wanted to go home. Like _home_ home… However, panic thoughts like that soon faded to the _back_ of my mind. I guess in a way, I reluctantly accepted the fact that I was here and I should make the most of it. I could adapt, right? Right…? _Doubtful…_

"I'm going out!" I yelled behind me, slipping on my sandals.

"Make sure you comeback before dinner! And don't leave the compound! Oh, and bring your brother back when you do!" yelled my _brother's_ mom from the kitchen.

After nodding in affirmation, not that she could see, I left the house.

There were few places my 'brother' would be during his few day offs. The river, one of the training grounds, or home. Since he obviously wasn't home, I decided to go to the second closest location, the training grounds. As I walked through the streets, people gave me the occasional glance. I didn't really blame them. I mean, a three year old walking alone with no supervision would raise eyebrows. But I guess the occasional glance was better than the constant stares from a few months ago.

It certainly caused a lot of commotion the first time around. Then again, a few people just accepted it because of how society worked here. I mean just how irresponsible were these people? Well, I guess it doesn't really bother to me _too_ much.

In a way, I'm kind of grateful for their ignorance. I've been crawling for two straight years, and I missed the mobility of walking on two legs. One could only stand being stuck in the same place for so long without getting bored. I can't even count the number of time I've played eye-spy all by myself because my vocal cords hadn't developed yet. Besides, I've died once and this time around I'm determined to live to the fullest…

I wasn't going to die again until I got married at the very least.

_If I even got that far…_

Entering the training grounds, I spotted two familiar figures. Ignoring the strange pain in my heart, I called out to them.

"Shisui-niisan, Itachi-niisan!" I greeted entering the empty field.

"Aya-chan…" nodded Itachi stopping.

Moments later, my 'brother', Shisui appeared behind me, placing a hand on my head. "Morning Aya!"

Thats right, my brother in this universe was the legendary Shisui Uchiha. At first, I didn't know how to take the news, but an idea dawned on me. Shisui was an essential figure leading up to the Uchiha massacre. All I had to do was fed some information to him and we would avoid the whole event. I would still be alive and the Uchiha wouldn't be all dead, a win win. The only ones that would lose in this situation would be Danzo and Orochimaru, but then again who really cared about them. It was a simple plan even I could follow. I hope… I was still figuring it out as I went along.

This new long term goal suddenly made living in the Uchiha complex ten times less suffocating than it was before. It also made meeting Itachi Uchiha a lot easier… "Itachi-niisan, where is Sasuke-san?" I asked hesitantly, removing Shisui-niisan's hand.

"Home… What are _you_ doing here?"

"I wanted help with my Shunshin…" I replied meekly, backing away from the boy.

Yeah, talking to the person who would probably end up killing you wasn't the healthiest thing for the mind…

"Again? You already have the concept down. Besides, didn't you want to go to the civilian academy?" asked Shisui and I nodded.

Even though I wanted a peaceful life, I wouldn't deny the allure of jutsus. Who didn't think pseudo teleportation or cloning ones self wasn't handy? If danger wasn't apart of being a shinobi, I would have signed up immediately.

"Why not send her to the academy?" suggested Itachi as Shisui contemplated my question.

"Great idea Itachi! How about it Aya. You would make a wonderful kunoichi!" urged my brother, for the millionth time, looking down at me.

"No" I instantly replied not even giving it a second thought.

_He and his parents sound like a broken record…_

"Why not?" inquired Itachi.

In all fairness, he did have a point. I was what people in this world called a _genius,_ and with how much I pestered Shisui about jutsus, it seemed like common sense I would want to be a shinobi. However, the image of a middle-aged man with a missing leg soon brought me back to reality.

"I don't want to end up like dad…" I replied sombrely which did hold some truth.

Besides actually dying, everything else about combat scared me just as much. This fear also included limb loss. Even though I didn't know my new family for long, it still pained me to see him get up every morning… Crutches, the limping, all of it. I couldn't bare the thought of losing a limb like Shisui's dad…

"You shouldn't let that deter you from the life of a shinobi…" sighed Shisui as Itachi just looked at us with a hint of confusion in his eyes.

"I know Shisui-niisan… So, about my Shunshin?"

"Ahh well… You got the concept down but you can't preform it"

"Why not?" I asked.

"You don't have enough chakra right now" deadpanned both shinobi.

"Besides, you chakra pathways are still maturing" add Shisui.

_Chakra? Oh yeah… I almost forgot about that_

Everything here just seemed so magical, I completely forgot this place still had limitations of its own… Still, it all seems fake in a way as well. Sort of like I was on the set of one of those Hollywood movies. Sure Naruto was cool and all, but I'd rather get reborn in OHHC, or Yuru Camp, or any other slice of life anime. I mean, watching twelve year olds murder other children with explosions was fine on tv. However, watching twelve year olds actually kill people with your own two eyes was a big no no.

_Why couldn't I been reincarnated in the world of S.A…?_

"Oh... Is that so?" I replied sheepishly.

"It is so…" mumbled Itachi.

"Then what _can_ I do right now? I'm already out here. Should I sit over there and watch?" I suggested.

"Well you could practice expanding your chakra pool. In fact, I've heard earlier the better" suggested Shisui.

"But isn't that rather hard?"

I didn't exactly remember how ones chakra pool worked, but I was guessing it wasn't easy… Nothing involving supernatural powers were ever easy. Well, at least that was what general fiction taught me. So the same rules must apply to the world of Naruto. _Right?_

…

_Okay_, I'll admit, this lack of information was really starting to bother me. I mean, I _forgot_ about _chakra_ pools in the world of _Naruto_ of all places! Even if I wasn't the biggest fan of the series this was still really embarrassing. I was willing to bet if my sister could see me now, she would be laughing so hard her stomach would hurt. She was hardcore about this stuff.

It also didn't help my self-esteem that I was almost certain the words _chakra pool _and _chakra exhaustion_ got thrown around daily in the Uchiha compound. Then again, one tends to forget about chakra exhaustion when you watched shinobi spam jutsus during the fourth great ninja war. I swear the author, Kishimoto I think his name was…? Only brought up chakra exhaustion when it was convenient, like injuries in a shounen anime. Still… The second I got back to Shisui's house, I was going to dig up some books…

"I think I'm going to sit over there for now…" I said pointing at a nearby tree.

Unfortunately, Shisui was having none of that. "Not so fast young lady. You asked for help and were going to give you some…" smiled the Uchiha.

Internally, I groaned at the workout I knew was coming. _Training_ was never a good word to hear come out of a shinobi's mouth…

* * *

**3rd POV**

As Itachi walked towards the head family house, there was one thing that occupied his mind. Who was the enigma that was Aya Uchiha?

Even after knowing her for a little over three months and being the sibling of his best friend, there was still many things that remained a mystery to him. The first time he saw her was when she tagged along with Shisui for training. She seemed happy to be around her brother until she saw him. The shear fear, panic, and unease radiating off of her was astounding.

Why was she afraid of him?

They had never met before, so what was it that triggered these emotions?

Then there was her incredible growth in maturity. She was only three and yet managed to complete grammatically correct sentences without failed. Granted there was still the slip of the tongue every now and again, but still a feat to be marvelled at.

However, the strangest quality about her was the fact she didn't want to be a shinobi. It wasn't wrong to be afraid of becoming one. Even he himself had doubts after his first kill. But what baffled him was that a toddler like her managed to understand the concept of death itself. In a way, he found it quite tragic. Not even he had to contemplate about his death until he graduated from the academy. Children at Aya's age generally thought they were invincible. Aya on the other hand? It was like these thoughts haunted her every waking moment. In Itachi's mind this was something he couldn't quite wrap his head around.

"I am home…" he muttered entering the house.

not even a minute later, his brother, Sasuke appeared out of nowhere.

"Nii-san! You're home. Okaa-san just made dinner, come on!" grinned Sasuke giving Itachi a big hug.

"Yes, it would be rude to keep her and Otou-san waiting…" agreed Itachi.

As the two boys took their seat at the dinner table, there was and eerie silence.

"…Itachi, how was training?" asked Fugaku breaking the silence.

"Good, Aya-chan joined us today…" respond Itachi in a monotoned voice.

"Aya-chan?"

"Shisui's sister"

"Older?"

"Younger"

"How…"

"She is three…" answered Itachi cutting off his father as silence enveloped the room once more.

"So Aya-chan is the same age as me?" chirped Sasuke.

"Yes, Otouto…" nodded Itachi.

"She was _three_ and you were training?" questioned his father, stopping momentarily.

"Shisui and I help worked on her chakra pool…"

"Interesting…" he muttered as the family of four continued to eat in silence.

However, Itachi didn't miss the glint of interest in his father's eyes.

It seemed Aya's peaceful life would not remain as quiet as she intended.

* * *

(A/N so the OC is Shisui's young sister, plot twist. Anyhow, like I said before no romance, at least for now. Honestly, I don't know what else to say so this is gonna be one short authors note. I already have chapter three ready, so expect another update soon. Anyway, R&R)

Last edit: November 19, 2019


	3. Chapter 3: Bygone Years?

**I don't own any of the characters or cover. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto except my own OC and the cover belongs to 月森うさこ****. Please enjoy the story and support the official release…**

* * *

(A/N I'm back for another chapter, told you this would be updated soon. So this is gonna be a pretty long chapter for this project, I'm aiming for these to be around 2,000 words maybe even less than that. Regarding the chapter though, it's gonna be a butch of short story fluff each with there own little title. Basically, after this there is gonna be a time skip and since I don't really like long time skips, I usually put some filler in-between. Most of these short stories are about a paragraph each so they're pretty short... Anyhow, there will be a bit of Uchiha/clan bashing... So sorry you Uchiha fan's but just because the OC is one doesn't mean they'll be getting any special treatment, they're still screwed)

* * *

**Chapter 3: Bygone Years Or Wasted Time?**

_Cold Day And Brotherly Care..._

**3rd POV**

It was the dead of night, and not a sound to be heard as Shisui watched over his sick sister. Their mom had taken dad to the hospital for his biyearly checkup, leaving Shisui in charge. He agreed not thinking much would happen, until his sister walked in with a mind numbing cold.

Deciding not to leave his three year old sister unattended too, he grabbed a bowl of water and stack of towels before making himself comfortable in her room. Sitting down, he looked around the bedroom. Shisui was mature enough to wait patiently and attend to Aya, but it was still incredibly dull. Just a bed and stack of books. No toys or posters when he was a child, not a single hint of that kind of stuff. All in all, this room contained the bare essentials. Maybe he should give her a table to read on or a bookshelf. Yes, that was a good thought. His sister loved to read, absorb every single piece of knowledge she could fine. Shisui just knew Aya would be a wonderful student.

While thinking of the perfect birthday gift, Aya broke the silence by muttering some incoherent words. "Just pass me the Advil… My head hurts… No, ginger doesn't help… Stop Hikari… Go play a video game or something…"

Shisui just looked at her with curiosity. Were those nightmares? They didn't seem like it. She actually smiled at the thought of some of them. However, the sweating and constant fidgeting of Aya was becoming disturbing.

Letting out a sigh, he lightly shook Aya awake. "Morning sleepy head. Did you have a nightmare? You were sweating an awful lot" said Shisui looking at the groggy Uchiha.

"It nothing, just give me the Advil and I'll be fine…" muttered Aya, still half asleep, rolling over.

"I don't know what an Advil is, but drink some water. You need liquids in your body" sighed the elder Uchiha.

"No… I wanna go to Tokyo tower, Hikari…" muttered Aya before dozing off once more.

Shisui didn't even think she heard him…

Honestly, little siblings could be troublesome and you can never quite figure out what's going on in their heads. But you still cared, no mater what happens. In a way that what he thought big brothers were supposed to do.

* * *

_It's Too Late..._

"Aya what are you doing? It's one in the morning…" demanded Shisui who found his little sister snooping around his room after returning from a mission.

"I-I was looking for something" she stuttered realizing she'd been caught.

In response, Shisui only raised an eyebrow. For the most part, his room was spotless. His calligraphy equipment was set aside on his desk, the bookshelf was ordered in alphabetical order, and his shinobi equipment tucked underneath his bed. What in the world could Aya be looking for.

"Well what is it? Maybe I could help you find it" smiled Shisui.

"I was wondering if you had any novels by Jiraiya the toad sage…" asked Aya making her brother go slightly red.

"A-are you interested in one of his book?" asked Shisui sceptically.

"Uhh… Yeah, that's why I'm looking"

"You know he is know for his… Ugh, I can't tell you… You're too young. Why are looking for one his books?" he demanded.

As a brother he needed to know what was happening. Shisui wouldn't let the purity of his younger sibling be tainted like this.

"Well… I was looking for his first piece of literature, The Tale of the Utterly Gutsy Shinobi. I overheard it was a good read from the old book store owner" said Aya as her brother let out a sigh of relief.

"I see, I believe I do have that one tucked away somewhere… Just give me a moment" he said looking around at the top row of the bookshelf. "Ahh here it is…"

Handing over the book to Aya, he gave her an inquisitive look. "Are you sure you want to read that? It might be a hard book for someone your age…"

"Uh huh, I've already read through every book on the bookshelf in the living room… I just needed some new material… Thank you again Shisui-niisan," said Aya before rushing out of his room.

Every book on the bookshelf outside huh, Shisui thought to himself.

Last time he checked, there was the one about the history of the Uchiha, several books on chakra manipulation that didn't fit on his bookshelf, the leaf bingo book, and… the Icha Icha Paradise book his mother bought for him when he reached _that_ age.

Oh no…

"Aya's already been corrupted…" paled Shisui realizing his mistake. He should have locked that book away when Aya was born. He failed at being an older brother… Shisui Uchiha didn't get over that one for a while...

* * *

_Summer Time Blues..._

**Normal POV**

It was summer, hot, and mind numbingly boring… Itachi and Shisui were on a mission and all the adults where cramped into the head family's house for a meeting. I asked if I could join but was quickly shot down. I couldn't blame them, a rebellion isn't something a child should be thinking about.

_But I just can't take my mind off it… Ironic huh…_

Letting out a sigh, I lied down on the front porch. Kicking off my sandals, as I continued my list of events to come.

Even after several weeks of practice, I still couldn't preform a proper Shunshin. I had the concept down but apparently my body wasn't physically ready. I guess I was getting ahead of myself there. I was disappointed, but at least it let me focus on other things. Namely remembering every single detail I could from Naruto and putting it into a conclusive timeline. Details where already getting fuzzy and I knew it was about time I put them onto paper.

Besides, it was good english practice too. I wasn't the best at the second language, but I could proudly say I was one of the better students. Good enough to consider going to America for studies. I wasn't about to let any of my prior knowledge fade into obscurity, no matter how trivial it seemed. Math, english, science, all of it. Especially that last one, the technology here was so far behind. I knew when to put the phone down, but that didn't mean I don't miss it.

_What I wouldn't give for a few episodes of anything right now, Naruto, HxH, OHHC, Maid-Sama…_

Anything and I mean _anything_ would do. Manga was good and so were regular books, but nothing could replace anime. Sighing, I went back to work knowing reminiscing about the past would only give me more heartache.

_Just stop thinking about it and forget…_

However, my peace was soon disturbed when a group of rowdy kids came by my house. Maybe that wasn't accurate enough… I meant every single child in the compound, save for the infants. Those babies were in a separate room in the head family's house.

"Hey Civilian!" greeted one of my neighbours, Gin I think his name was.

"Hello" I replied ignoring his intentional jab at my pride.

Looking between the kids I immediately recognized a few of them. There was Hana, Yu, and a bunch of other kids who like to antagonize my peaceful way of living.

"We're starting a game of ninja. Want to join or are you too scared" teased Yu.

"Sorry, I have better things to do then play" I answered glancing towards my timeline.

"I beg to differ…" said a voice behind me.

Turning around, I found Shisui right there. It seemed like he just returned from a mission. His flak jacket was still on and one of his selves was singed. However, he still had his iconic brotherly smile plastered on his face.

"I think it's a good opportunity for you to socialize with others your age. You barely get out in the first place" commented my bother gently pushing me off the porch.

_Then let me participate in the meeting, I'm twenty-two…_

"Alright…" I sighed slipping on my sandals.

* * *

Ninja was a relatively simple game. Actually I don't know if it could be classified as a game, it more like roleplaying than anything else. Masquerading as ninjas with tinges of hide and seek, would how I'd describe it.

There were two teams, the first ran and hid, while the other seeked. There where some additional rules but from what I understood, that was the gist of the game.

"What are the teams Gin?" asked Hana.

"Hmm the regular ones" replied Gin nonchalantly hands behind his head.

"But Gin… Your team always wins" pouted Hana.

"Fine, you guys can take Aya then"

"But Gin… This is Aya, she's so bad at the game…" complained Hana, whispering, thinking I couldn't hear.

Still, she glanced in my direction to see if I noticed. However, I just stared at the ground as if it was the most interesting thing in the world. I didn't want to deal with these children's fake apologies. No matter if you were in elementary or high school, or even the work place, wherever you went there aways seemed to be backtalk. It just seemed so natural, and something you tend to ignore eventually…

"Nope, teams seem fair to me! Remember, count from thirty. No cheating" grinned Gin as he, Yu, and a bunch of other kids ran off.

As we watched the other team disappear, Hana quickly asserted herself as the leader. "Okay, let's split up…" she ordered sending off kids in different directions.

Soon, it was just me and her left.

"Here, this is your Kunai. If you see anyone on the opposite team hit them with it. But don't let them hit you. If you get hit then you are out!" she said handing me a _kunai_.

_It's just a stick…_

"Do we have to hit them? Won't tapping them just work as well?" I asked inspecting the piece of wood.

"I guess… But that's not fun!" Hana exclaimed.

"But someone could get hurt" I noted.

Kids from my previous life would never think of such a vicious game. Even when I was a child, tag was enough to satiate our immense stamina reserves.

"So you're scared"

In a sense, I sort of was. These kids were three and they were already playing mass murder. It wasn't real but still… It didn't sit well with me. However, I had to remember this was a game and this wasn't the world I knew. These children wouldn't hurt each other… Right?

"N-no… I'm just worried some one might get hurt" I said.

"Thats just what a civilian would say. Just make sure you get at least one" yelled Hana running off leaving me all alone.

Looking around me, there was no one in sight. Taking one last glance at the stick, I dropped it on the floor. So much for socializing… No one was around.

_I'm going to read… I'm too old for this_

As I walked back home, I noticed Gin and Yu being chased by Hana. Looked like they were having fun… A child's imagination was a wonderful thing.

But I wasn't a child, not anymore. I left all of those good memories in that place… Tokyo… Hikari…

_I wonder how Hikari is doing these days?_

My heart began to twist and turn, almost pleading for some sort of relief.

_No, stop it. Forget, and make the pain go away…_

* * *

_What Is Pride And Sisterly care..._

**2 years later**

"Aya, keep a watch on your brother for us. We won't be away for long" smiled Shisui's mom giving me a sweet smile as she left the house with her husband, for his now _yearly_ checkup.

Things weren't looking so good for the Uchiha right now… Monthly checkups went to bimonthly, then biyearly, and now, yearly… Honestly, I would feel more sorry if both of Shisui's parents weren't hardcore elitist Uchiha. They kept bugging me about becoming a shinobi and constantly moaned about their Uchiha pride. Both of which wouldn't happen if I was still with _them_.

Sometimes I wished the Uchiha could just put their stupid pride behind them and move on already. I mean, it was like they were asking the world to put them down. Half the elders were egotistical and most of the kids were snarky at best. There were hardly any humble people around here. Honestly, I could count the number of Uchiha on my fingers who wouldn't start mumbling about how they got a 'raw deal'.

_I guess it was sort of true with Danzo and all, but still…_

Whats so good about clan pride anyway? Decades of murdering others wasn't something to be proud about, at least not in my opinion. And yet these shinobi, not just the Uchiha, take so much stock in things like pride. I just couldn't understand. I mean, I knew this kind of mindset was prevalent back in Japan's early history… But just because I knew, doesn't mean I understood. It was because I came from a laid back family, or it might even because of the english blood coursing through my veins, or maybe because of some other convoluted reason…

No matter the cause, I knew I was just _different_. Very much so, because _my_ parents would never leave a five year old child watch the house. Granted, Shisui was also here but he was out stone cold with a fever.

Closing the door behind her, I let out a sigh. Walking into the kitchen, I pulled out a jar of honey and a kettle. Setting aside the honey for now, I waited for some water to boil. I remember someone telling me a long time ago that honey water helped with sore throats. I don't remember who though, I think it was an aunt or maybe mom. Never tried it myself though, I hated honey with a passion.

Hearing the kettle go off, I turned off the stove. Normally, Shisui would have never let me into the kitchen but he was out of commission right now. Still, I can't believe his parents wanted me to go to the academy yet they won't even let me cook… I found it kind of silly how they had their priorities set up.

Taking a mug out of the cupboard, I poured Shisui a glass. Setting aside the remaining hot water for tea or something, I made my way to Shisui's room. Opening the door, I found the room was completely dark. Turning on the lights, I put the glass on his nightstand. "Here, honey water. I hear it's good for your throat" I said.

Not waiting for a reply, I exited the room and grabbed some towels. Next, I headed back to the kitchen to get a tub of water. Reentering Shisui's room I dropped the tub and towels on the floor causing a small splash. Curse my tiny body. It was almost impossible to get anything done. "This would be so much easier if I had a bottle of Advil…" I grumbled before clasping my hands over my mouth.

_This is the fourteenth time I let something slip…_

"Hmm, What's Advil?" asked Shisui who was now awake and sipping the water I gave him.

"Nothing! H-how's your cold?"

"Doing much better, thank you for the… 'Honey water' was it?" thanked Shisui sipping the liquid.

"Your welcome… I guess it really does work" I muttered eyeing the mug with a glare.

"I remember now, you don't like honey… So, who told you about this remedy? It's really soothing, I need to tell mom about this. It works wonders it tell you!" exclaimed Shisui before coughing sporadicly.

"Someone from a long time ago…" I said with a sad smile.

"Hmm… I see, but still doesn't answer the question of how you got the hot water for this. Was mom making tea before she left?" asked Shisui suspiciously.

_Crap! Busted…_

* * *

(A/N so, how was the chapter? I haven't really ever done comedy before, so I don't know how well I did on the slice of life stuff. As for the OC's personality, she has a sore case of home sickness. I don't really see this that often in OC fics so I wanted to give it a go. As for the Uchiha/clan bashing bit, this is just her personality honestly... She doesn't really like her new 'family' and probably only cares about Shisui at this point. She finds all the kids really naive, Shisui's parents just annoy her, and she's still down right terrified of Itachi. Will things get better for her? No, they won't. At least not for a while. Anyway R&R)

Last edit: November 22, 2019


	4. Chapter 4: Budding Talent?

**I don't own any of the characters or cover. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto except my own OC and the cover belongs to 月森うさこ****. Please enjoy the story and support the official release…**

* * *

(A/N Sorry, but this is gonna be a short chapter. I know not a lot of people like fluff, so I wanted to update as soon as possible. Anyways, I'm probably going to get some hardcore fans mad because I'm going mixing things up a bit. What I mean by this is nature transformations. Yes yes, I know this isn't something you touch until genin at the earliest but give me some slack please. There isn't going to any action for a while, so this is the most Narutoish things thats going to appear for a bit. I also had to use a bit of head cannon for the training section and how chakra control works... I'm trying to stay as close as I can to the original work but it's hard, sorry. On a special note, in response to (Guest) I completely forgot Izumi existed! Anyways, thanks for reminding me. I always thought her fate was a bit tragic so I hate to say it, but there might be some romance in the future...)

* * *

**Chapter 4: Budding Talent Or Wasted Potential? **

It was seven in the morning and a five year old Aya yawned at her brother, as they sat together in the Uchiha training ground. "Why are we here, Shisui-niisan?" mumbled the girl trying to stay awake.

"We are going to work on your Ninjutsu skill" proclaimed Shisui giving his sister a soft smile.

"And didn't I say, 'I don't want to be a shinobi'?" sighed Aya taking in the scenery, particularly the oriental pond.

"You did… But this isn't about being a shinobi," explained Shisui, while Aya raised an eyebrow. "You know about the traditions of the Uchiha clan, right?"

"Uh-huh, I've read basically every single book in our house Shisui-niisan… Including all of ones regarding the Uchiha clan" grumbled Aya still trying to figure out why Shisui dragged her out of the house.

"Then you know too officially be recognized as an adult you need to know the Great Fire Ball jutsu (Gōkakyū no Jutsu)"

"What's the point of all this?" asked Aya.

"I'm going to teach you the jutsu" sighed Shisui getting straight to the point.

"Wha?" gawked Aya doing a double take.

"You heard me"

"But what if I don't want to?" asked the girl.

"It's tradition…" eyed Shisui.

"Well I don't care about tradition… Maybe I just want to stay a kid" whispered Aya through gritted teeth. "Besides, from what I've read, chakra transformation is advance stuff. Something you don't learn until late Genin at the earliest… And I mean _earliest_. From what I hear, some Chunin can't even do it"

"I know, but I believe you have the skill to learn it" smiled her brother.

"What about Itachi's brother?"

"Sasuke? What about him?" questioned Shisui, slightly taken aback by the sudden mention.

"He wants to be a shinobi, so why don't you teach him?"

"Itachi or his father will teach him when the time comes. Besides, like I've told you this isn't about being a shinobi"

"But…"

"You had no qualms about learning Shunshin or walking on water. Why are you being stubborn now?" questions Shisui.

"Because moving fast and walking on buildings is convenient… And maybe because I wanna show off a bit" muttered Aya looking away at the last part.

"And the Great Fireball technique isn't convenient or flashy?"

"Why in the world would I need to set anything on fire? Besides I only managed to actually complete my first _successful_ Shunshin a month ago…" sighed Aya remembering throwing up her breakfast very vividly that day.

"You are _five_ Aya. The fact you can even manipulate chakra at this age is amazing! chakra coils don't even reach a usable state until you're around ten. I can't believe I'm saying this, but you've got the best chakra control I've ever seen. I guess all of those constant chakra exercises worked out" praised Shisui.

"Uh-huh… And didn't you and Itachi comment about my pitiful chakra pool during training all the time?" deadpanned Aya.

"Just give it a shot" pleaded the elder Uchiha before handing Aya a piece of paper. "Here, just force your chakra through this paper"

"Fine…" sighed Aya, releasing some chakra as told before.

"So, you have an affinity for water huh…" said Shisui as the paper in Aya's hand turned damp. "This may be a problem…"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I was hoping for a fire affinity like the rest of our clan. I guess you really are something special huh Aya. Anyhow, this will make it much harder to actually learn the Great Fireball technique…"

"Do we give up because it's too hard then?" asked Aya hopefully.

"No, that means we just need to try harder" replied Shisui. "Although, you are right about it being a bit too hard to start off with. Instead, lets practice some water transformation"

"Whoa, hold the phone-" gasped Aya wide eyed.

"What's a phone?"

"Never mind that, how did we go from learning a clan jutsu too practicing a nature transformation!"

"Well, the theory for each nature transformation if quite similar to one another. I just wanted to you get comfortable with the nature you have an affinity for before moving onto the hard stuff"

"You're crazy…" gawked Aya.

"I'm just practical. Now here, take this leaf" defended her brother, handing the girl a leaf.

"What do I do with this?" she asked skeptically, inspecting the leaf cautiously.

"Don't worry it's just a normal leaf. Now, start draining the moisture out of it" laughed Shisui.

"Draining the moisture?" echoed Aya raising an eyebrow.

"Draining the moisture" he repeated.

"How in the world would I do that?! I'm not a mage or sorceress and I certainly don't create water out of thin air" sighed Aya, who was starting to grow irritated at her brother's antics.

Letting out an equally exasperated sigh, the boy walked over to her. "Here, hold it like this. Put the leaf in the palm of your right and place your left hand on top. Don't press too hard though. You want to extract the water though chakra control, not brute force… Now focus, I don't know how it works for other people, but I find envisioning the element I want to use helps a lot" explained Shisui while Aya just clenched her eyes shut in focus.

"...So, think of flowing water?"

"Exactly, do you feel it yet?"

"It feels really weird… Like I have an extra appendage or something"

"That's likely the chakra you're controlling that's outside your body, for me it more like another entity I'm controlling with my will. I guess, that how it must feel for people with high chakra control huh… An extra appendage, sound interesting. Oh, sorry Aya I was getting off track. Now, grab the moisture in the leaf and pool it into your hand" apologized Shisui, looking back at the preoccupied Uchiha.

"Gather… Pool… Gather… Pool…" chanted Aya as she envisioned using her invisible appendage to gather the moisture around her.

"_Feel it Akane. Gather the moister around you. Pull it from the trees, pond, air… Envision the water vapors coming together, now pool it into your hand. Condense it!" _thought Aya as she tried extracting the moister from the leaf.

In fact, she was concentrating so hard, Aya couldn't even hear her own brother calling out to her. "-ya! Aya!" shouted Shisui, breaking the girl's concentration.

"W-what was that for" gasped Aya, trying to catch her breath. "I-I almost had it"

"Your using too much chakra, you're going to pass out like that" frowned Shisui. "Although, I guess it wasn't all for naught… Look there"

Glancing at the direction Shisui was staring at, Aya saw the leaf now dried enough to be used as kindling and a fingerprint sized patch of moist earth. "Wha- What happened" asked Aya too tired to try piecing everything together.

"You extracted the moister from the leaf alright…"

"Oh…"

"And the air, and the pond… Honestly, it's kind of scary how good you are at this considering it's your first time. Most people never get it on the first try" sighed Shisui. "With this kind of skill, you could be an amazing shinobi"

"D-don't wanna" gasped the girl almost falling to the ground, before Shisui caught her in his arms.

Bringing her to a nearby tree, Shisui leaned her against the trunk before sitting down as well. As the two sat there in silence, Aya decided to strike up a conversation. "Ne, I heard some of the guards saying some bad things about the village elders, what's that all about?"

In response, Shisui froze momentary. "You shouldn't need to worry about that kind of stuff"

"Alright… I just hope things don't get any worse…"

"Neither do I…"

The thing was Aya seemed much more concerned about this the Shisui.

"I still need to think of a plan…" whispered Aya.

"What was that?" asked Shisui thinking Aya asked him something.

"Nothing!" yelped Aya. "S-so… can we go home yet?"

Letting out a sigh, Shisui knew this was going to take a while. With a talent like the one Aya had for water, Shisui thought it was really weird she didn't want to be a shinobi despite the dangers. In a way, he found it kind of ironic. The water manipulating Uchiha who didn't want anything to do with violence…

Aya wasn't a fighter or an avenger. The exact opposite of an Uchiha, but Shisui didn't mind this. It would keep her safe. With a mindset like hers, he was sure Aya wouldn't be caught up the coup. Still, in his heart, Shisui hoped it didn't come to that. But if it did, he would do _anything_ to protect her… Even if it meant betraying his own clan…

* * *

(A/N Before you guys leave this fic for good, let me explain please. Okay, I rationalized the OC being able to do nature transformation so young because of latent skill and practice. Granted, you can argue that this is still unrealistic because not even Itachi could do it and he's a genius. And to those who say that... I have absolutely no defence. But for those who can accept the OC for having a nature transformation, I wanted to explain why I gave her water instead of the standard fire. Yes, the OC does have _some _talent for fire, but I thought water better suited her personality and would serve as a kind of symbolism. As you can see, the OC goes with the flow most of the time, not really having a specific plans in life. As for the symbolism bit, the Uchiha specializes in fire and the OC doesn't exactly see herself as an Uchiha, simple as that. Will the OC become a mary-sue? I hope to god not. If she does seem to be trending in that direction please tell me... Anyway R&R)

Last edit: November 25, 2019


	5. Chapter 5: Consolation?

**I don't own any of the characters or cover. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto except my own OC and the cover belongs to 月森うさこ****. Please enjoy the story and support the official release…**

* * *

(A/N Happy New Years! Okay, so my reason for not update was because I honesty didn't know where I was going with this... Yeah, I was sort of making this up as I went along. Anyways, I needed some time to create a back log of chapter and an actual plot line for the near future. Basically, everything up until the Uchiha massacre is on page now. I might make a few changes based on comments but no major plot changes. Although, because of this back log, I'll be able to update a bit quicker than usual. Now, onto the chapter!)

* * *

**Chapter 5: Consolation Or Torment?**

**Normal POV**

**1 year later**

"I'm what?!" I gawked as Shisui's family sat at the dinner table.

"Your going to the academy dear" repeated his mom.

"B-but…"

"Don't complain Aya. Fugaku-sama specifically wanted you and Sasuke to represent us at the academy. Think of this as an honour. Show those Konoha brats what an Uchiha is made of" said his dad.

"But I don't want to be a shinobi!" I told my new family of the millionth time.

I was not just about to go just because the clan head wanted me in the stupid academy.

"You won't be alone either. Sasuke will also be in the same class" squealed his mom.

"This isn't about being alone mom… I just don't want to be a shinobi. It's a dangerous job!"

"Dangerous?! You are an Uchiha young lady! Show some pride!" yelled his dad, Sharingan swirling as he glared at me.

"Honey, calm down we are at the dinner table…" mediated Shisui's mom, as I gave an internal 'thank you' to the woman.

"No, I have had enough of your daughters stubbornness. Listen here young lady, everyone in this family has been a Shinobi! Your mother, grandfather, me, even your own brother have all served the clan and so will you. It has been this way for generations. It is tradition!"

I don't understand why these people don't get it! I do not want to be a shinobi! I could die out there and it doesn't even seem like they care! It was moments like these that I wished I was back in-

_No, I can't remind myself. Those good memories are beginning to fade and it has stay that way…_

My heart started aching…

_It just has too…_

"I'm not hungry anymore" I muttered leaving my chair.

"Come back here young lady. I'm not done with you yet!" I heard his father yell as I closed the door to my room.

* * *

**3rd POV**

"Father, I think its fine Aya doesn't want to become a shinobi… Having her learn the basics is enough" sighed Shisui hearing the door to Aya's room close shut.

The boy knew his sister wouldn't change her mind. He tried years ago and it didn't work. In his mind, giving her the bare minimum knowledge to be accepted into the clan and defending herself all she needed at this point. Over the years he began to grasp what kind of person Aya was. It was a shame in his opinion. His sister had talent, she just have the heart.

"Shisui, you and your mother are too soft on her. Do you know what everyone else calls her?" demanded the patriarch, still glaring at the door. "They call her a freak. A somehow I'm starting to believe them…"

This caused a reaction from the rest of the table.

"Honey, that our daughter you're talking about!"

"What, because it's not true? She doesn't talk to anyone besides Shisui and Itachi. Do you want happened yesterday? I called her over and she just ignored me, walked straight to her room! Not to mention she can't speak properly and hides in the house every waking hour unless one of us kicks her out. Do you know what I had to listen to during the monthly meeting for the past three years? Apparently, everyone thinks Aya is too scared to play with the other children?! Do you know how much shame that brings us? People are beginning to look down on us. We need to doing something about Aya. I swear, there is something wrong with her"

"Honey you know she has problems communicating with children her age" defended the matriarch. "I'm sure if we give her time…"

"How much time then? We already waited six years. The only reason nobody has called her out on it is because she's a genius. An asset to the clan, but if she's not willing to become a shinobi… Well then, I think I've said enough"

Shisui narrowed his eyes. He certainly respected his father, and the rest of the clan, but this was too far. To completely disregard his sister because she needed a little help was just wrong. "Mother, Father, Aya can communicate perfectly fine. She certainly is shy, but…" started Shisui but was soon cut off by his father.

"The fact she still talks gibberish? Aya is six, she's not a child anymore. We all agreed to let it slide until she started at the academy. Now the time has come" he said in an absolute tone, as silence engulfed the room.

The sudden rebuttal, stopped Shisui in his tracks. As much as he wanted to defend her, Aya certainly was weird. Over the years, he could see Aya developing a language of her own. Maybe if he was a bit firmer in his duties as an older brother her social disconnect wouldn't have happened. After a moment of silence, Shisui slowly stood up. "I will see how Aya is doing, please excuse me" he mumbled, leaving the table with a concerned mother and a sneering father.

* * *

**Normal POV**

When comparing my room to other kids my age, mine was incredibly dull. Just a simple bed, closet, table, and a whole ton of books. I guess I was never really social in this life and preferred to shut myself in reading and gaining knowledge of this world. Although I really took to the latter after forgetting about _chakra exhaustion_ of all things. It were times like those that made me wonder how I was still alive. Still, it wasn't like I was anti social… At least in my opinion. Back in the land of good memories, I didn't have any problems making friends and what not, so why couldn't I here? It just felt weird when I hung out with other kids. Maybe it was because mental, I was almost four times older than everyone else. That, or some other reason, honestly I didn't really know.

Picking up a stack of papers on my desk, I dragged my self to the bed. Lying down, I looked through the rough timeline of Naruto I written out two years ago. My memory was good don't get me wrong, I could still remember-

_No, forget Ak-Aya…_

But still, after six years things tend to get fuzzy. "Two more years at most huh…" I muttered to myself counting down how my much time left I had before the massacre.

"Two more years?" came a voice right beside me, causing me to jump dropping the pages.

Entering my room through the window, Shisui sat on my bed and picked up the timeline. "Whats this? I can't read it. Is it some sort of code?" he asked with a strained smile, holding up the timeline.

_Thank god I wrote it in english…_

"I guess you could say that… What are you doing in my room?" I asked as he tossed me the timeline.

"Just wanted to talk to my sister. Is that so wrong?"

"Who put you up to it? Dad?"

"Nobody. I just wanted to talk…"

"Could you please talk then." I said impatiently. I was still quite miffed at the _family_ conversation downstairs.

"Why are you so afraid of becoming a shinobi, Aya?" he asked in a serious voice. "I understand you don't want to, but at this rate you'll be… Banished at worse and shamed at best. Nobody wants that to happen, so you need an explainable reason to the clan"

I gulped at this. Shisui almost never used this tone with me. Even though I was technically older, that piercing gaze still gave me the chills. It was unsettling, and it showed as I clenched my teeth. "I don't want to die…" I answered plainly.

Releasing the gaze, Shisui let out a sigh… "Do you know the saying those who fear death have never truly lived?" he asked.

"I have… But those are the words of somebody who hasn't died" I replied, whispering the last part.

Reaching out to grasp my hand, Shisui tried to look me in the eyes but I turned away. "Alright then, but at least tell me why you don't want to interact with the other kids? Is it because of a bully?"

…What do I say to that? Sure, Gin and the other don't exactly treat me like the most popular kid, but did that count as bullying? Was it a bit rude, yeah, but bullying? I never really thought about it like that. Unfortunately, I didn't get to respond as Shisui took my silence as a yes and continued. "Then is this bully a person called Tokyo?" he asked causing me to flinch.

H-how does he know about Tokyo…? I realize I've been becoming more and more reckless, and I've berated my self countless times over it… But not even I was loose lipped enough to let something like _that_ slip…

"I keep hearing you say that name in your sleep. I've been meaning to ask you lately, it's becoming concerning. I'll be honest, I may have tried to investigate this myself, but nothing came up. I'm sorry if this brings up bad memories, but running away won't get us anywhere"

"I don't know what you are talking about…"

"Aya I'm just trying to help, you don't need to hide things from me. I know Gin and his group have been agonizing you, but you don't really seem to care. This Tokyo on the other hand, you seem to have nightmares about this person or place at least once a week" sighed Shisui, probably wondering if he'll ever get me to talk about my personal problems.

"Why don't we go outside, I think dad is calling me" I lied horribly.

"Aya…" he said sternly, I could tell he wasn't going to take no for an answer.

"I don't want to talk about. Leave me alone, please!" I shot back aggressively.

Shisui widen his eyes then immediately narrowed them.

_Crap I might have been a bit too aggressive_

He knew something was up. I need to get out of here.

"I realize I haven't been the best brother at times, but this isn't the time to be fighting me on this. Father is at the end of his wits and so is mother to an extent. I want to help"

"A-and, so?!"

"So? Don't you think I haven't noticed how you have nightmares every single time you go to sleep? How you keep sleep talking about Tokyo? Or even how your cry in the bathroom occasionally whispering words I can't understand?" he said face filled with concern, digging deeper. "I didn't want to say this but… Everyone thinks you're mentally unwell. I realize I'm not the best consoler, and I would bring you to a Yamanaka if I could… But you need to work with me here"

_Please don't remind me of that place, it makes my heart ache…_

"Why do you care?! Stop poking your nose where it doesn't belong!" I yelled tears welling up in my eyes.

"I want to help you. If it's to much lets start with some basic questions and ease are way into the problem," said Shisui and I just shook my head.

_Stop it. I'm trying to forget_

"Who is Hikari?"

_Don't talk anymore, I can't take it_

"Tell me about Tokyo…"

_Please!_

"I care about your safety, so please talk to me"

_No!_

"Well I care about your safety too! But it's not like_ I_ ask you about your stupid ANBU work! I don't want _anyone_ I care about working a job that could _kill_ them! I don't even know _why_ you people do it?! Just for some stupid clan _pride_! I'm sick of it!" I yelled instinctually as Shisui visibly paled.

When I finally realized my mistake, I pulled my hand away and took a couple steps back, placing a hand over my mouth.

"Aya… How did you know?" he whispered.

"I-I… I need to go calm myself down…" I replied as I Shunshin out the window.

* * *

(A/N Ha! OC, finally broke. At this point I would like to address the recent comments. First, thank you Irina Akashira, najex, Blu3b3rryT3a, and others. Your comments have really help shaped this chapter and future ones in helping explain some prior plot holes. After reading over the previous chapter, I realize I've been a bit heavy handed with the RL metaphors. My explanation in the story is that only Shisui has been exposed to said comments. The OC at this point has only really held a conversation with Shisui and Itachi (way too scared of him to say anything important tho). Due to this and the lack of social interaction, the clan thinks she's got mental problems (including Shisui), and honestly she probably does. As for Shisui's OOCness, unfortunately I decided to embrace it. I'll be honest, I like Naruto but I'm not hardcore. My impression on cannon Shisui is fuzzy at best and I'm not going to search through countless episodes of filler to get a better grasp of his personality. At this point it might be easier to sallow if you just see my interpretation of Shisui as an OC. Moving on, to all the comments on the OC's water affinity. Yes, I knew it was a bit unrealistic and I sort of regret it... However, I wanted to mention it while Shisui is still around. As to the repercussions for ninjutsu use, I'm limiting it to fainting. I don't want to physically cripple the OC as well just yet. Anyhow, sorry for the long authors note. I think I included way too much foreshadowing but hey, see if you guys can figure it out. The last thing I want to say is prepare for tragedy, your about to get a lot of that soon)

Last edit: January 1, 2020


	6. Chapter 6: The Heartfelt Confession?

**I don't own any of the characters or cover. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto except my own OC and the cover belongs to 月森うさこ****. Please enjoy the story and support the official release…**

* * *

(A/N New chapter already? My, you guys sure are lucky... But in all honesty, I didn't want you waiting too long after that cliffhanger. Still, 6 reviews in two days, I can't thank you guys enough. They help me a lot and I appreciate the time you guys take to post them. This story has always been a side project and it's already surpassing my other one in terms of growth. As for the comments, I'll address them first before starting the chapter this time. For those who were wondering about Izumi, don't worry she will be showing up soon. The only thing I'm worried about is how well I can portray her character. As you can see with Shisui, some times I can go off the rails a bit. From what I can tell she is a bit Tsundere-ish with a caring personality and a willingness to help, but please correct me if I'm wrong.

As for Irina Akashira, both plotlines you put forward are quite interesting. Though none of them fit the bill quite right, you did mention several elements I'd like to incorporate. However, I should mention this fic will end with it being a semi AU. The OC is a coward and she will run (mentally and physically). However, I feel like it defeats the purpose of why I created this fic. I wanted to do something different from romance and slice of life, so I don't want a mundane ending where the OC goes into hiding and dies peacefully somewhere in water country. I just thought I should mention this to show where I'm going with this plot. Anyhow, as I said before, prepare for tragedy.)

* * *

**Chapter 6: The Heartfelt Confession Or The Painful Lie?**

Shisui was shocked. So much so, he didn't immediately give chase after Aya. But was she really Aya? Shisui didn't want to admit it, but he had heard her mention a sister during her nightmares a few times. But she didn't have a sister, she had a brother, him. It was like she was living a double life, just like he was. And ironically she was keeping it a better secret than his.

How did Aya know he was in the ANBU? Shisui had always covered up his tattoo and didn't leave any equipment at home, preferring to leave it at ANBU HQ. Did someone tell her? Impossible, only the Hokage knew the identity of ANBU members. This made him wonder what else was she hiding?

"Shisui what is going on up there?! I heard yelling!" cried their mother, breaking Shisui out of his shocked state.

"Nothing!" Shisui hastily replied as he began sifting through the papers on Aya's desk.

Perhaps there was a clue to what she was doing behind all their backs. Not knowing what was important or not, Shisui separated the papers into two broad categories. The first pile was full of what seemed to be normal documents, such as study notes. The second was anything that contained that strange code Aya was looking at earlier.

He had always assumed that the 'code' was just childish nonsense, be he didn't know what to believe anymore. Being in the ANBU, Shisui was familiar with deciphering all sorts of messages and puzzles. But somehow, he could crack the nonsense his six year old sister had written down. After several minutes of staring blankly at the pages, he almost did believe it was nonsense and he was just overreacting. However, he soon made a breakthrough when he finally sifted through all the papers. At the bottom of his sister's organized stacks of papers were a set of photos. Well, to be more specific they were hand-drawn sketches, but when Aya's involved they may as well be. The only important ones were an almost photographic drawing of a family of four he didn't recognize and skylines of places he's never seen, all the other ones were two smudged and tear-stained to be useful.

It didn't seem out of the ordinary for Aya to be drawing, but this picture just didn't make sense to him. What concerned him were the people drawn. These were not Uchiha… The garb they wore was different not to mention the man was blond. There were no blond Uchiha and Aya couldn't have known anyone with blond hair. Could it be that Aya just forgot to shade the man's hair? In Shisui's mind that wasn't possible. If there were two things Aya actually cared about it was her arts and literature. She would never let a drawing go unfinished before starting anew. Then there were the skylines. Every one of them was beautifully detailed, it was just as shame there were these large obelisks obscuring the view. In all honesty, Shisui didn't know what they were and he was getting nowhere with this.

Folding the drawing of the family into his pocket, he turned his attention to the open window. There was only one place he would get answers, Aya herself. Jumping out, he began searching for all the locations she could be at. There was the training ground, the river, and a select few other locations. Never the less, he had to hurry. Looking at the sky, he could feel a storm brewing.

* * *

"What took you so long…" muttered Aya as she tossed another stone into the river.

Not even a minute later, Shisui appeared behind her with a somber expression on his face. "What is this?" he asked pulling out the drawing as he handed it to his sister.

Looking at the drawing, her eyes widened then softened as she fell into a state of melancholy. "This brings back memories… I thought I got rid of it" said Aya with a painful smile, looking at the faces on the paper.

"What is going on Aya. I want the truth. I want to help you. I'm your brother, we are family." stated the Uchiha, but he right now he didn't even know how much was what he said was true.

"You wouldn't believe me. You would think I'm crazy and send me to T&I. Besides it doesn't matter anymore, I just want to forget now… The memories are painful, you know?" whispered Aya in a hoarse voice.

"I would believe you. You try to hide things, avoid questions, but you don't lie." smiled Shisui.

"Lie horribly you mean… And I really do try to hide things, I'm just too sentimental and loose-lipped to keep them hidden" muttered the girl clenching the parchment in her hand.

"Please Aya… Just talk it out, sometimes someone to talk to is all you need"

Then silence filled the air. Shisui didn't even need to look into her eyes to know how conflicted she felt about this. How big was this secret? What was she hiding? Shisui wanted answers to all of these, but at this point pushing Aya would just make her break. Eventually, his sister closed her eyes and took a deep breath to calm herself down.

Handing the sketch back, Aya sat back down once again. Shisui could tell she was nervous, her legs were visibly shaking. "Who am I?" she asked but said it in a way as if questioning this herself.

"Aya Uchiha age six…" answered Shisui think that was pretty obvious but Aya didn't think so…

"Am I really Aya Uchiha? But that's just who I am now aren't I, just another name given to me? Then what do I-"

"Aya slow down, you're not making sense now. Why don't you start off by telling me who are the people in the sketch are"

"The girl with the waist long hair in front… She's… It's me…?" Aya answered hesitantly as if she didn't know how to word it.

"What?"

"Her name was Akane Hatori and she was nineteen years old when she died in the streets of Tokyo due to sixty-eight stab wounds," explained Aya looking into the sunset, the bright glowing orb contrasting with the dark skyline.

And just like that, everything clicked for the older Uchiha. This person who was she? Shisui desperately wanted to know who exactly was this girl. However, feeling she was on the brink of a mental breakdown, Shisui tried to ask in a roundabout way.

"How old are you?" asked Shisui in disbelief.

"I'm mentally twenty-five? I think… M-maybe twenty-four?"

"What? Who are you?" he unconsciously said, letting the dreaded question slip out.

Unfortunately, just as the elder boy expected, the girl didn't take it well at all. "I… I don't even know anymore. Who am I? Aya? Akane? me?" she rambled looking at her hands.

"Calm down… Aya," he was losing her, and just calling out to her by that name made the girl flinch. "For starters, what do you want me to call you" suggested the boy, knowing this was likely a sensitive topic for the girl considering her most recent reaction.

"For practicality sake, A-Aya. I've gotten used to it by now… And it would be weird if you just started calling me something else, right?" she said a little too quickly, not even sure of her own answer.

Shisui wasn't buying it… She just wanted to get it over with, run away from the problem, tell him what _he _wanted to hear. "Okay, then what do _you_ really want to be called? Don't think about what anyone else wants to hear, because you would just be lying… to yourself and everyone else"

After he said this, there was a long silence between the two. Shisui wanted to say something else but couldn't. What could he do? Maybe he could help Aya. But was she really just _Aya Uchiha_. She had always been distant, not just from strangers, but her own family as well. Like as if… Her mind was somewhere else, locking away memories. Or her heart was bottling up emotions that threaten to spill out. Hiding things that would break the facade she's been trying to keep up, not just for others but for herself as well.

If these were the true colours of his _sister _then… No, Shisui couldn't use that word to describe Aya anymore. The word 'sister' implied to many things Aya apparently wasn't and would never be. She already had a sibling in her heart, they both knew he could never replace.

It pained Shisui he didn't realize this until now. That whenever he called himself her brother, Aya's mind constantly drifted to the girl known as Hikari. What kind of… No, Aya would never truly consider him a _brother_. Even if she said it, _acted_ like the perfect sister, in her heart it would never be a reality. In the end, Shisui couldn't say he knew 'Aya' in the first place.

Just when he thought Aya wouldn't give him an answer, she spoke. Barely audible and with tears running down her face, she spoke. "Ak-Akane…" she whispered.

Shisui gave her a melancholic smile… It was a forgone conclusion. A fact the two of them both knew. The utterly painful yet true fact she would choose that part of her being. Still, it pained Shisui to know he lost to a girl he had never met.

After giving Aya a few moments to let years of bottled up tears roll, he finally spoke again. "Then Akane, what does this all have to do with knowing I'm in the ANBU?"

"Y-your taking this rather well… You see, where Akane's from… There is a manga series. A manga called N-naruto, which takes place in this world…" started Aya, stumbling over a few words, obviously still pretty shaken.

"Wait, world?" interjected Shisui.

"Yes, a world where c-chakra and shinobi don't exist. A-anyhow, Naruto details the adventures of a young boy from this village. Using this series, I can keep track of events that occur around me, past, present, and f-future. And from what I can tell so far, it is pretty accurate" continued the girl growing slightly more confident.

"Pretty accurate? That doesn't seem…"

"I-it's accurate. Enough for me to know about the c-coup" interrupted Aya in a pained voice.

"You know about the coup?!" exclaimed Shisui before narrowing his eyes.

Aya just nodded her head, not knowing how the boy would react.

"How does it end?"

"T-the coup fails… You d-die and Itachi… He k-kills everyone, except Sasuke, with the help of another Uchiha" she replied, voice trembling.

"Itachi… God, you're not joking. We need to report this to the Hokage…" said Shisui in all seriousness grabbing his sister's arm.

"N-no, are you crazy!? There is a reason I had all of those papers in English!" yelled Aya pulling out of his grasp.

"I'm not going to even ask about what English is, but why can't we tell the Hokage? Because this isn't a game Aya. Peoples lives are at stake"

"I-its complicated… Danzo stole one of your eyes. You gave the other to Itachi before throwing yourself into this very river, committing suicide… Danzo then orders Itachi to m-massacre the entire clan" explained Aya much to the shock of Shisui.

Shisui was flabergasted... Danzo? Itachi and himself both knew he would be the biggest obstacle to save the clan from extinction. The village elder always preferred liked doing things his way and he didn't hide his disdain for the Uchiha, but to go that far... Shisui didn't want to believe it, but he could deny it wasn't out of character for the shrewd old man.

"…Then what were you going to do before I found out…?" muttered Shisui, shaken, as one would be after learning about their own death.

"I-I thought about running away at some point… Getting as far away from here as possible" admitted Aya turning away, not being able to look her 'brother' in the eyes.

"Akane…" he muttered in a voice filled with disappointment.

"L-look, I wasn't even a year old and I'm not proud of it myself. I-I didn't know any of you at the time…" explained Aya, trying to defend the idea which still sat in the back of her mind.

"I don't even know what to say… I thought better of you _Aya_, but apparently I was wrong" said Shisui.

"Look! I don't know! I-I just, maybe thought you and Itachi would figure something out. I convinced myself things would be okay four years ago, but they aren't. I thought I could think of a better plan, but I couldn't, okay." screamed Aya, she wanted to cry but there weren't any more tears to be shed.

"You couldn't think of a better plan because you're too afraid of dying, of doing something yourself"

"O-of course I'm afraid! I don't want people to think I'm crazy! I don't want to go to T&I"

"You're a coward… How can you be so hesitant when your whole clan is on the line?! No, that isn't it. Did you even consider them _family_ in the first place?" stated Shisui turning away.

"I…"

"Don't… I'll try and convince the elders. I'll even use my Mangekyo Sharingan if I have too…" he said looking her in the eyes, Sharingan swirling.

"You'll die… This is exactly what you did last time, nothing will change…" sobbed Aya.

" And nothing will _change_ if we don't do anything. I'm a _shinobi_ of Konoha and I will do everything to _protect_ the peace in this _village_" mumbled Shisui as Aya dropped to the ground, vision growing dark. "Goodbye…"

The next time Aya's eyes opened, she was alone. Not a trace of Shisui Uchiha to be found. The only things she could see were the trees, the river, and the glowing moon illuminating the darkness.

How long was she out? Aya didn't care. To her, there was only one thing on her mind. Shisui Uchiha was gone while she just lied there, letting everything sink in. Then just when Aya thought she could cry anymore, a new flood of tears came gushing out of her eyes. "I'm sorry… I'm so, so sorry… I couldn't change a thing…" whispered Aya clenching the dirt in her fingers.

As if on cue, small droplets of water began to fall from the sky. Whether what she said was to herself or Shisui, Aya didn't know. Unfortunately, she would never get to reconcile with her 'brother' because that was the last time she ever saw him.

* * *

(A/N Whelp, I think it's about time I keep referring to 'Aya' as the OC and not by name. I explained it in the chapter, but I wanted to do it here as well so I won't need to deal with story flow and all that. Anyhow, as you can probably tell, the OC has a hard time letting things go. This is why even years after her 'death' she still can't forget about her 'family'. To put this in perspective, say you were forced to leave your country and relocate to the most dangerous place you could think of, never being allowed to go back. You weren't allowed to say goodbye or take anything with you, and the cherry on top is you've got a new name to boot. That's basically the OC's situation right now. She wasn't given a choice in the matter and still considers herself Akane for all intents and purposes. Sure, we could say deal with it. But letting go of the identity you've built over _nineteen_ years can't happen that easily. All these compounding factors are the core of her identity crisis and eventual breakdown. I'm not good at creating complex characters, so I kinda based how she's reacting off myself. Call me selfish or a coward but like I said in the beginning, this is a semi-self insert. The difference being the OC actually grows a backbone eventually. Again, comment if you have any ideas and I may consider adding them. Now, as for Shisui, he's pissed as one would be. I'm not going to be removing him from the list of characters on the synopsis, he still has a role to play. Sorry, if these authors' notes are just getting longer and longer, sometimes I just can't help myself. Next time, get ready for some Itachi, cause he hasn't shown up in a while...)

Last edit: January 1, 2020


	7. Chapter 7: SS Itachi 1: Chasing Water

**I don't own any of the characters or cover. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto except my own OC and the cover belongs to 月森うさこ****. Please enjoy the story and support the official release…**

* * *

(A/N Okay, so... I do have a backlog of chapters. The reason I'm kinda late, well, I can only say exams. Anyhow, thank you for all the comments on the last chapter. Now, time for everyones favourite section of addressing them. To start, yeah Shisui wasn't thinking quite too rationally. My rationalization of his actions was that he basically just got told off by the person he cared most about. However, I would just like to say didn't leave immediately and when he did, Shisui was _very_ well informed. As for the CRA stuff... No, just no. Personally, I dislike forced/arranged marriage scenarios for the most part. To me it just feels wrong most of the time.

As for BlueMapple, I do like the idea of a civilian story. However, that's not really what I have envisioned for this fic, sorry. But, there is another fic call "Dragonfly" by peccolia on this archive that does do a civilian Uchiha route. So, for those that are interested in a civilian Uchiha, you might want to check it out, I highly recommenced it. Anyhow, let's get on with the chapter, it's Itachi time. Oh, and more tragedy)

* * *

**Chapter 7: SS Itachi 1: Chasing Water**

Itachi, was running around the compound like a mad man though pouring rain. No, he wasn't a mission, but in a way you could say he was. Shisui Uchiha had gone missing. It wasn't a widely known fact, only Shisui's immediate family and himself knew. How did this happen? Aya Uchiha happened…

That evening, Itachi decided to visit Shisui. Itachi had been scheduled for a mission, but had been cancelled on short noticed. This ended up giving the pre-teen a lot of free time. It had been raining since, yesterday and the storm hadn't let up. Normally, he would be staying home, but he wanted to discuss some of the clan's moments with the fellow ANBU. Once he reached Shisui's residence, rain started pouring down even harder but it was a bit late to turn back now. Worst case scenario he would just stay over, not an uncommon scenario these days.

After greeting Shisui's parents, he asked where the boy was, but the responses he got from both parents were nonchalant looks. Apparently, both Shisui and Aya were missing. The last thing the parents heard were yelling, Shisui telling them nothing was wrong, and the sound of a window closing quiet forcefully. They assumed the two got in a fight and the 'brat' ran off with Shisui chasing after her. That was one whole day ago, before the storm even started. From the looks of it, they weren't even concerned for their daughter's safety. Shiui could take care of himself, but Aya? She wouldn't last in a storm like this.

This caused Itachi's brows to furrow. As much as he wanted to criticize the parent, he had no right to tell them how to raise their children. With the storm now raging to new extremes, Itachi decided to stay a bit before going back to the main house. However, just as Itachi was about to enter, he saw a body trudge through the street. It was Aya, and only Aya… Shisui was nowhere to be seen.

The girl was covered in mud, her head downcast and eyes puffy… Itachi also could have sworn she saw tears streaming down her face, even with rain masking most of it. Being the closest to the girl, Itachi went over to help Aya. Trembling in her Itachi's arms, Aya gripped his sleeve before let out a few course words… "H-he's gone… I looked, and he's gone… He's gone and not coming back… It all my fault… He's going to die… I couldn't stop him… The c-coup… Elders… You have to stop him… Please…" whispered Aya, barely audible before fainting in his arm.

The first thing Itachi thought was how Aya learned about the coup. The next was the fact she knew someone was going to die… It didn't take a genius to figure out what she meant. There was only one person Aya Uchiha could be referring to, Shisui.

Who else could it be? Everyone else she knew was right there. Dropping Aya off with her parents, Itachi ran off in search for his best friend. That was how the current situation came to be, as Itachi continued his search. Perhaps this was overreaction on his part, but Itachi had an inkling to what Shisui would do. Piecing together Aya's broken sentences wasn't to hard, he just hoped he could find Shisui before it was too late…

* * *

Shisui had suggested once upon a time that he could use his Mangekyo Sharingan, Kotoamatsukami. However, Itachi quickly shot it down. It was far too risky, and Shisui concurred lightheartedly. However, Itachi wouldn't put it past him to try on his own, especially if it was for Aya. Shisui has always been idealistic in a sense, and Itachi aways did wonder if that would be his downfall. Maybe, Shisui and Aya's latest argument sparked something inside him. Regardless, it would be best to find the boy before he could do anything stupid.

He had hardly looked in all the obvious places but still no luck. Rushing past some houses, a voice called out to him. "Itachi-kun! What in the world are you doing"

It was a feminine voice. Itachi didn't know many girls, well, at least not by name. Fangirls usually cried out his name and looked at him with wooing gazes, but the voice that called out held a tinge of familiarity. There was really one girl that fitted this description… "Izumi-san" whispered Itachi looking at the girl with rare panicked eyes.

Sensing the distress, Izumi motioned him over and opened the door for him. Itachi knew this wasn't the time to be dawdling around, but he knew his mind was clouded. Slowing things down a bit at actually think things through might help. Besides, the girl already had the door open and turning her down now was just rude. Entering the house, Izumi lead him to the dining table. Apparently the two of them cause quite the commotion, because Izumi's mother, Hazuki came down the stairs. "Izumi, what are you- Itachi-sama! My goodness, what are you doing here at this hour? Why are you all soaked?" gasped the woman looking between the two.

"Itachi-kun was running past the house, several times in fact… I don't know what's going on either, but running in the rain isn't something a person does for fun. So, Itachi-kun what in the world is going on?" asked Izumi in a concerned tone.

"Shisui has gone missing for an entire day now" stated the boy, glancing at the storm roaring outside.

""What"" gasped both females as they tried to make light of the situation.

"Could it be he's just out for a mission? He's a shinobi right, it isn't that strange for him to be gone" asked Izumi sceptically.

While Izumi didn't know Shisui on a personal level, she knew he was Itachi's best friend. Besides, the boy had a reputation in the clan as one of their most talented members. Having him just up and disappeared was almost inconceivable.

"No… Shisui was at his house up until yesterday. He had been chasing after his sister after an argument. The only one to return was his sister… Shisui would never let her return in the state I saw her in no matter the argument they had…"

Between the two of them, they both deeply cared for of their siblings. However, as much as Itachi didn't want to admit it, Shisui was likely the more devoted of the two. Itachi would always put the village first with Sasuke rivalling in priority, he just couldn't put one over the other… Shisui on the other hand, it wouldn't surprise Itachi if he would do almost anything for Aya and that was the scary part.

"She was in shock and said some… _disturbing_ things. I believe he is about to do something reckless" murmured Itachi.

"Calm down dear, maybe you're just over reacting" suggested Hazuki and Itachi wished she was right.

However, the middle aged woman didn't know what was really at stake here. The rest of the clan didn't know, but he and Shisui were spies for the Hokage, tasked with monitoring their own family and friends. At this point it wasn't really a secret anymore, a coup was in the works. Of course, several members of the clan still didn't know, an example being Izumi herself. As a half blood, she wasn't deemed worth to be part of the future uprising. However, that was beside the point. Itachi wasn't worried about Shisui being dead or just wanting some time to cool off. No, Itachi was just worried that Shisui might destroy any hopes of negotiations, if he handles the situation lightly.

"Perhaps, but I worry…" muttered Itachi before standing up. "Thank you for your hospitality, but I must be going"

However, before he could leave, Izumi grabbed his wrist. "Are you really going to go back out there" questioned the girl, now really worried about Itachi and how he was handling the situation.

"I'm afraid so…" sighed the boy, and Izumi tensed.

"Then I'm coming with you" she stated standing up as well.

"That isn't necessary… I can locate Shisui on my own"

"I know, but who's going to look after you" she retorted and Itachi furrowed his brow.

"Izumi-san, I don't believe I require looking after. I think you would know that well enough" replied Itachi and Izumi flustered a little.

"Well, you could use the back up. Two people are better than one" huffed the girl and before Itachi could respond she tacked on, "And I'm not taking no for an answer".

Knowing how stubborn the girl can get, Itachi didn't say anything and let the girl tag along. Before the two of them set off on their search, Hazuki tossed them two cloaks. She didn't need Izumi or the next head catching a cold on her watch. "Be careful you two, be back before dawn"

"Got it mom, let's go Itachi-kun" replied Izumi as Itachi grunted in confirmation.

Watching the two leave into the night, Izumi's mother let out a sigh. "Sometimes I wish you were here to see her now, dear. She'll become quite the woman someday… I just hope I live long enough to see our grandchildren" whispered the widow wondering if the future head would ever take a fancy for her daughter.

Shaking her head with a melancholic smile, she prayed for their safe return.

* * *

(A/N Izumi finally makes an appearance. It only took her what? five chapters since I first mentioned bringing her in. My procrastination aside, how do you like the new chapter title? From here on out, if there is a major focus on another character, I'll be putting down SS(Side Story) with the associated character name. The way I've been naming my chapters is to showcase the pessimism of the OC. You know, the second half of the titles. But if the OC isn't making an appearance, the naming scheme doesn't really fit. Anyhow, next chapter will be uploaded sometime today, lucky you guys. By the way, tell me how I did with Izumi, because she'll be around for a while)

Last edit: January 29, 2020


	8. Chapter 8: SS Itachi 2: Illogical

**I don't own any of the characters or cover. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto except my own OC and the cover belongs to 月森うさこ****. Please enjoy the story and support the official release…**

* * *

(A/N Double update! Congratulations, you won't need to wait month. Anyhow, this chapter is a direct continuation of the last. Originally, chapters seven and eight was just one huge chapter, but I'm aiming for less than 2k word chapters. All in all, I don't have much to say in this authors note so enjoy, R&R)

* * *

**Chapter 8: SS Itachi 2: Illogical **

**3rd POV**

"So, any idea where he could be?" asked Izumi as she and Itachi ran though pouring rain.

"Unfortunately, no. If I did I would've headed there immediately"

"I guess you're right. Do we split up then?"

This question cause Itachi to pause for a moment. Normally, he would have said yes… However, with the storm as it is, it would be almost impossible to communicate over a distance or rendezvous after splitting up. There was also one last reason Itachi wasn't so fond of the idea of splitting up. If Shisui was indeed planing to do something about the coup, that would expose Izumi to confidential information. Aya had already been exposed, something he would need to deal with later. He didn't need another causality in this mess.

In any case, if Izumi were to uncover the coup, at best she'd be put under a restraining order and at worse, silenced… Itachi wanted neither to happen to Izumi who was aiding him out of the goodness of her heart. All these factors made the decision pretty obvious.

"No, the rain would make it more of a hassle than benefit" replied Itachi, shaking his head.

"Good point, so where have you checked so far?"

"The elder's houses, training grounds, river, forest…" rattled Itachi and Izumi looked on in amazement.

"You covered all that area in such a short amount of time! But… Isn't that the entire compound? Does that mean he entered the surrounding forest or upstream of the river?" suggested the girl and Itachi seemed to be thinking along the same lines.

"We cannot rule out the possibility he decided to enter the village"

"But… The compound is on lockdown. How in the world could Shisui get out unnoticed? Even now there are guards stationed at the compound gates. I know your friend is good, but those guards are Chunin level at worst" said Izumi with a pointed look.

Letting out a sigh, Itachi contemplated how to handle this situation with Izumi. This girl was playing with fire she didn't even know was there. However, it was too late to have her go back now. Eventually, Itachi settled with telling the girl a few half-truths. "Then Shisui is that skilled. I have done it with him on multiple occasions" replied Itachi leaving out some key information.

That sudden declaration was enough for Izumi to almost stumble, causing Itachi to grab onto her cloak. "Be careful, the roofs are a lot slipperier than they otherwise would be"

"Sorry… I-I just didn't know I was that below you in terms of skill…" mumbled Izumi, berating herself at her most recent fumble.

In that moment, he felt sorry for the girl. He could understand where she was coming from. She wanted the power to protect, yet didn't have the strength. That was the whole reason she decided to become a shinobi. Within the entire compound, Izumi was perhaps the most serious rising kunoichi in their age group. Now after all that effort, she was comparing herself, a genin, to a fully fledged ANBU.

Itachi knew she had a crush on him, but couldn't bring himself to ignore her like all the other fangirls. Her drive and admiration made Izumi intriguing in Itachi's eyes, with even a hint of respect. Naive as she can be, Izumi knew when to get down to business, making her presence all the more bearable. She did have her vulnerable moments to his mysterious charm, but could focus on whatever task at hand. In fact, he was beginning to contemplate inviting her to one of his and Shisui's more relaxed training sessions. Well, that was until a certain someone decided to go missing.

"It's fine you should move at your own pace. Rushing will only lead to trouble" stated Itachi looking at the gate, thinking how that last part was also directed at Shisui.

"Your right, so where do we check first?"

"The village, anywhere else and we won't even have a chance at finding him" stated Itachi throwing around numbers in his head.

The elders were so far untouched and Itachi knew Shisui didn't keep any ANBU gear in his house. That meant, Shisui had to go procure weapons and equipment at HQ. All this information meant Itachi still had a chance to prevent Shisui from doing anything rash.

"Thats fine and all, but how do _I _get past? As much as it pains me to admit, I can't do whatever you and Shisui can to sneak pass" grumbled Izumi, contemplating how to get into the village.

"Leave that part to me" assured Itachi, as the two headed towards the gate.

With the two Uchiha nearing the compound gate, they began to make out the silhouette of a watchtower, manned by three guards. Any closer and the two ninja were at risk of being caught. "Itachi-kun, we're getting too close. You know the punishment for getting caught, you're the next head" whispered Izumi, as Itachi place a finger over his lips.

"Turn right" stated Itachi, making a sharp turn.

Following closely, Itachi lead Izumi to a section of the compound wall. Unsure of the whole process, Izumi glanced at the guards only to notice they were out of view now. "This section is a blind spot, Shisui and I discovered. Underneath this rock is a tunnel that will lead outside the compound" stated Itachi walking over to a rock, before pushing it aside revealing a tunnel.

"Is it really that simple?! How have the guards not caught on?" asked Izumi, mystified at how easily they were bypassing the compounds defences. "Wouldn't a Genjutsu be more efficient? Or at least something that hides the tunnel better"

Itachi shook his head, before entering the tunnel. "Sometimes the simplest methods are the best ones. Any feasible long term Genjutsu would easily be sniffed out. However, unlike the Byakugan, the Sharingan can't see past objects. The clan is too confident in their abilities. Confidence is good, but too much will lead to ignorance. And ignorance, leads to openings…" explained Itachi exiting the tunnel with Izumi behind him.

"Openings indeed…" mused Izumi looking at the tunnel before turning back to Itachi. "I think we should start our search here will a standard sweep and move our way through the village."

"Agreed, let's go" nodded the male, before the two Shunshin into the night.

* * *

Nothing, that was what their search has uncovered. At this point, even if Itachi didn't show it, he was growing increasingly worried. They were running out of time, time they didn't have. By next dawn, the Uchiha elders could very well be huge blood stains on the floor if things ended badly. If that happened… Itachi didn't even want to think about it. At the very least, the Uchiha would only become more agitated and paranoid. They would likely suspect that the village has caught onto their coup and do something drastic.

Somehow, sensing Itachi's worries, Izumi placed a hand on her friend's shoulder. "It'll be fine, we'll find him" said Izumi will as much confidence she could muster.

However, it was fairly evident to both Itachi and herself that they were both running low on steam. Izumi was just tried, and the mental stress was starting to pile up on Itachi. They have been moving around for a good two hours, checking everywhere they could twice. Well, everywhere except one place.

"We must check the academy…" sighed Itachi, looking at the building in question.

In response, Izumi widened her eyes. "Itachi-kun, you're asking us to sneak past ANBU guards. The whole reason we didn't check that place was because we both speculated the Hokage would have at least one or two guards patrolling the perimeter his office. And now you just want to check it out?!"

"Yes, but what if we had a reason for visiting…" suggested Itachi.

Honestly, this was his last resort. It would make Izumi suspicious, especially if she was left behind, but Itachi could secure a meeting with the Hokage. Admittedly, this was under the pretext of reporting on the coup, but in fairness, he did have a rather important matter to address.

"Your serious" gawked Izumi and the boy nodded.

"I just can't bring you along" stated Itachi, as Izumi began to pout.

However, Itachi was dead serious. Having her tag help with the search was fine, but he wouldn't let Izumi endanger herself. Eventually, the girl relented, and gave him a long sigh. "Fine, where do we meet?"

"Across the Hokage window, there is a tall building. We'll meet there, as I'm going under the guise of meeting the Hokage" explained Itachi and Izumi just nodded along.

* * *

As the two split up, Itachi began to make his way to the Hokage's office. In the corner of his eye, he could see that Izumi had already made it to her spot with his Sharingan. Good, everything was in place. In fact, he could already see a few guards and… Shisui! What was he doing at the Hokage's office?! None of the guards reacted to his presence, so he assumed he was there for official business.

Regardless, Itachi was shocked to say the least. Refocusing, Itachi switched targets and began closing in on Shisui. As he tried to catchup with his friend, Itachi summoned a crow. Instructing it too relay a message to Izumi about his current situation, Itachi began to pick up the pace.

In fact, Itachi was so engrossed in his pursuit, he didn't even notice the shifting environment. Shisui was no longer in the village, instead heading towards the river? This confused Itachi. Wasn't Shisui's intentions to place the clan elders his genjutsu? Why would he need to go to the river?

As Itachi contemplated these facts, the two Uchiha slowly, but surely made their way upstream. Eventually, Shisui stopped at the very top of a cliff overlooking the river. If under any other circumstances, Itachi might have thought the moon and glistening water contrasted with the falling rain made for a spectacular view. However, his mind was clouded and body exhausted from all the mental stress. "Shisui, don't do it" said Itachi walking towards his longtime friend.

Turning around, Shisui looked at him with a bit of shock, before his expression changed to one of understanding. "Ah… I see Aya finally got to you" smiled Shisui.

"What do you mean?" questioned Itachi not in the mood for games.

"I asked her to tell you to find me, and it worked. She should be forgetting everything about last night right about now, though… I'm not proud of how I had to do it" sighed Shisui flashing his Mangekyo Sharingan.

It took him a moment, but the stoic Uchiha's eyes widened. "You used your Kotoamatsukami?!" exclaimed Itachi, with an expression close to one of shock.

Itachi would have never believed it if Shisui didn't confirm it himself. Shisui Uchiha actually used his most potent genjutsu on his own sister. But it made sense… How else would Aya know about the coup. If that was the case, then it practically confirmed that yes, Shisui did cast Kotoamatsukami on Aya.

It completely baffled Itachi, this wasn't the Shisui he knew. For Shisui to do something like that… It was just, unfathomable too Itachi. Unfortunately, Itachi was also too tired to speculate, leading to ask a single question.

"Why? What happened to you Shisui. What happened during the night before the storm?" asked Itachi narrowing his eyes in confusion.

"Many things Itachi… But a good word to summarize that night would be… Revelations" smiled Shisui, turning back to the river. "In fact, one could say I'm about to bite off more that I can chew"

Shisui chuckled a little as Itachi continued to at his friend with confusion. "Then don't do what you're about to do. Calm down and think Shisui. If you take this situation lightly, you'll ended up destroying the entire clan-"

"Itachi let me ask you a hypothetical… Between that clan and your brother, who would you save?" asked Shisui out of the blue catching Itachi off guard.

This caused Itachi to frown, this was no time for games. He was about to let out a retort, before actually contemplating the question. What _would_ he choose if given the situation. Itachi was no stranger to hypotheticals as he and Shisui did them quite regularly during training. During those instances, he always went for the most logical answer, but this specific hypothetical made him second guess himself.

At face value, without any pretence, the question was blatantly obvious. Weighing the life of one person against the lives of hundreds, that just wasn't a fair comparison. However, this question had a deeper meaning to Shisui and Itachi. To give up the person they held dearest, or a clan teetering on the edge of collapse. Itachi was conflicted, his logical mind told him to give up Sasuke, but he knew he could never do it. He could give up his father, his mother, even Izumi, but not Sasuke…

"Sasuke…" muttered Itachi, fist clench.

Nodding, Shisui proposed another hypothetical. "Then you you give up _anything _for Sasuke?"

"Yes…"

"Even if that meant Sasuke hating you?"

Itachi clenched his fists even tighter.

"Then-"

"Shisui, what is the point of these hypotheticals" demanded Itachi.

Letting out a sigh, Shisui looked up at the falling rain. "Confirmation. To reaffirm my resolve"

"There is nothing to reaffirm Shisui, just come home. Aya is worried sick about you"

"Aya… I guess she must be" smiled Shisui. "Itachi, I need you to do me a favour, look after Aya for me… She'll likely feel guilty, but she'll need support. She'll feel like she can't accomplish anything, but she can-"

"Why would Aya feel guilty? Shisui, what are you saying?" asked Itachi, as Shisui started moving closer and closer to the water.

"That the future Aya sees won't be happening… That I'll protect her, because in the end, isn't that what big brothers are for?" asked Shisui before jumping.

"Shisui!" cried Itachi.

Rushing over to the cliff, Itachi peered down the waterfall. What had just happened? Itachi's eyes began to burn. Everything about this night was illogical.

Bursting out of the foliage, Izumi looked around the clearing. "Itachi-kun, I got your- W-what happened"

Walking over to the boy, Izumi saw Itachi in shock. Not only wide eyes, but full blown shock. That was not something that happens. In fact, something that shouldn't happen.

Itachi looked up at her, his eyes morphing, changing. The pupil and iris merging together to form a three sided pinwheel. However, Izumi couldn't care about the eyes. To her, the vulnerable state Itachi appeared was much more concerning. "I-Itachi-kun?"

"He jumped… Shisui jumped" muttered Itachi, as a single tear rolled down his face.

Izumi, slowly put two and two together, and just pulled Itachi into a hug. Izumi could tell Itachi was hurting, he just lost his best friend. But as the two embraced, the questioned remained, what in the world happened tonight? Nothing made sense. Why did Shisui jump, what was he talking about? Revelations? What revelations. None of that mattered now. Shisui was gone.

No one could have survived that fall. It didn't matter if the rain obscured their visions, the math checked out.

Shisui Uchiha was _dead_.

* * *

(A/N Okay, Shisui is finally _dead_, so take that how you will. Overall, I don't really like how this chapter turned out, especially the end. Personally, I feel the end doesn't convoy enough emotion for Shisui's death to have impact. Sure, you can tell Itachi feeling the grief but not much else. Maybe I wasn't descriptive enough, I don't know. Regardless, I'll probably come back for a revision or two. Also, I know Shisui's character took a major 360 in terms of character. However, this is intentional and you guys will need to play detective to figure out what happened after the OC passes out. Oh, and here's a hint to get the speculations started, Shisui still has both his eyes)

Last edit: January 29, 2020


	9. Chapter 9: Melancholic Memories?

**I don't own any of the characters or cover. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto except my own OC and the cover belongs to 月森うさこ****. Please enjoy the story and support the official release…**

* * *

(A/N Two days and I'm back, didn't really want to leave you guys hanging. First, I think I need to clear up my feelings on the CRA. Okay, so they do indeed exist in this fic. Personally, I believe, although not stated it wouldn't be out of the ordinary for something like the CRA to exist. I mean, arranged marriages were really prevalent way back when, I just dislike the concept and what the CRA stands for. Due to this, I won't be putting the OC through council BS, she'll be long _gone_ by then. However, I may mention the CRA during a SS with Itachi or Sasuke. Anyhow, onto the chapter! And the tragedy train just keeps on rolling...)

* * *

**Chapter 9: Melancholic Memories Or Mourning Murderer? **

**Normal POV**

**A few weeks later**

As Shisui's family gathered around the small memorial, my eyes began to burn up for the hundredth time. Everything for the past month has been a haze, there were times I couldn't even remember what I was doing. When Itachi told me the news, my eyes began to feel like they were melting in my sockets. I didn't want to hear it. I wanted to hole myself up in my room, but I knew covering my ears wouldn't turn back time. It was too late, Shisui-niisan was dead… And I was the one who caused it.

_No, I can't call him Nii-san anymore… I lost that right a long time ago. Actually, I don't think I had it in the first place_

Maybe I could have stopped him if I tried harder. Maybe if I got on my knees and begged him not to go that night. Maybe this wouldn't have happened if I tried a different approach to solving the massacre. But in the end, nothing changed. Shisui was right, I was a coward.

Death… A funny thing really. I've been trying to run away from it for so long, I've just killed someone to run a little bit longer. That was the thing that made me even more disgusted with myself. I knew the pain, the feeling of dying… And I just subjected that torment onto someone else because I was too scared.

Looking at the photo, I started at his eyes. If there was one word to describe that photo, it would be content. I don't think he thought himself as particularly lucky in this life, but I could see in his eyes every day for the past six years that he was happy. Just like me he had a family, friends, a future, and a dream he wanted to achieve.

_I took all that away…_

I wonder, if he reincarnated like me… would he retain his memories like I did? If so, what was he feeling right now? Honestly, he probably hates me. Not being able to look at the picture of Shisui Uchiha any longer, I excused myself. This wasn't how I wanted to spend my first time out of the compound, attending Shisui's funeral. It didn't even feel like I belonged there…

I wanted to blame whatever god was out there for sending me here. But what would that accomplish… It was all pointless. As I walked through the graveyard, I saw a face I haven't seen in a while. "Hello Itachi-niisan…" I greeted in a dead tone.

In an uncharacteristic move, I decided to take a seat next to him as we stared at the endless headstones. Normally, I would be trembling on the inside, like all of my other encounters with the stoic Uchiha. However, that didn't seem to happen today for some odd reason. Maybe because the death of Shisui still haunted me, or more likely, I had given up.

"Are you not angry? I am the prime suspect for your brother's death" said Itachi not even looking at me.

"I am angry…" I started causing Itachi to turn his head in my direction.

_I'm angry at myself… I might as well killed him with my own two hands_

"Hm…" grunted Itachi.

…

"Ne, what were my Shisui's last words?"

"I don't know…"

"Don't lie to me…"

"…"

_No answer…_

"Did he resent me until the very end?" I questioned.

"…"

_Silence ag-_

"…No…" he ultimately replied causing tears to form in my eyes.

Shisui was too nice. His forgiveness only made me feel guiltier, almost wished he cursed me to the bitter end. I began to cry, not caring Itachi was right beside me.

"Itachi-niisan, do you think Shisui-niisan died in vain…" I choked out, looking him straight in the eyes.

"That I do not know… But he was acting quite bizarrely before his death" he said with the smallest tinge of emotion, clenching his fist.

"Yeah… I guess" I muttered blankly, before standing up. "Mom and dad are probably wondering where I am now…"

"Mn…" agreed Itachi.

"It's been nice talking to someone about it… Thank you" I said glumly, walking back to the funeral.

* * *

_It was dark, fog everywhere. I couldn't tell where was I going. In fact, why was I moving in the first place. Where was I?_

"_You coward…" groaned a familiar voice._

"_Shisui-niisan?" I muttered, turning around to see if it was really him._

_And there he was… A bloody corpus, lacerations covering every inch of his body. I gagged at the sight of it, I could barely stand the smell._

"_Don't call me that!" seethed Shisui looking at me with judgmental eyes._

"_W-wait…"_

"_I'm done waiting! I'm dead now thanks to you!"_

"_I…"_

"_That's right, you can't even say anything! It's pathetic. You, are pathetic coward Akane Hatori" declared Shisui before walking into the dense fog._

"_Wait!" I yelled chasing after him._

_Running to where he last stood, I looked around to where he might be. Then, I saw a light. Walking towards it, the fog began to dissipate as the light began to shine bright. Soon it reached a point where I had to shield my eyes._

_The next time I opened them, I saw Shisui… But not just him, every single Uchiha I knew. All of them dead in a huge mound of bodies. I couldn't even begin to describe how sick I felt, but by some miracle I kept my stomach in check. Regaining my senses, I began to back away. However, before I could take even five steps back, I bumped into someone. Looking at who it was, I saw a person I thought I would never see again._

"_Hikari…" I mumbled reaching for a hug, but instead she simply backed away._

"_What have you done Onee-chan?" gasped Hikari, looking at me with disgust._

"_Wha-" I started, but then I noticed my blood soaked hands._

"_How could you? How could you, Onee-chan" said Hikari running away from me._

"_Wait!" I yelled, chasing after her._

_However, before I could reach her, everything went white._

"Hikari!" I yelled jolting up from my bed.

I was breathing hard, which was sort of to be expected. Wiping away the sweat that covered my face, I pulled back the covers. I need a shower. A cold one at that.

Honestly, I didn't know which nightmare was worse. Prior to Shisui's death I always had this one dream where I was living back in Tokyo before everything was ripped away from me by some unknown figure. Now? It was _that_ dream… every single night. I know that it's fake, I keep telling myself whenever I'm in that place. But the look in Hikari's eyes always felt too real.

It hurts so much to see Shisui, almost on par of not being able to return home. I don't want him to treat me like he did in that dream. That wasn't the understanding person I knew… But were my actions even _understandable_? I killed the man who looked out for me, the guy who for six years treated me like family. The only person in that household that let me make my own decisions. The closest person I had in this life and I killed him.

It hurts _so _much. But why? I cared for him that's why… I cared for him just as much I did for Hikari in my past life, my own sister… Hetreated me like a _sister_, and I couldn't even do the same for him. I've kept him at arm's length for so long. I should've given a chance, an opportunity, anything! But I couldn't… No, it wasn't that I couldn't. I just didn't. I'm a _fool_. A past obsessed _fool_.

_What was that old saying again? You don't realize what you had until it's gone… I feel that saying defines my entire existence right now_

Grabbing a change of clothes, I headed to the shower. On my way out of the room, I noticed today was circled red on the calendar.

_Oh… I really don't want to do this today…_

* * *

"I see you have finally come around… Shame, it took your brothers death to do so. Now show them the talent of the Uchiha, Aya!" smiled Shisui's dad pushing me out the door.

That's right, I gave in. I'm going to the academy. I could have put up more of a fight, but what would that have done? I was going to die in the next two years, it didn't matter which school I went to now. I'm sure if Shisui saw me now he would be disappointed, but what could I do? All hope of surviving till fifty, having children, settling down… crushed.

As I walked to the gate of the compound, head downcast, I ran into Sasuke and his mother. "Oi, Okaa-san! Who's that?" asked Sasuke pointing to me.

"She's the younger sister of Shisui, Sasuke. I hear she's a genius just like her brother. She'll be joining you at the academy from this day forth." smiled his mother as I walked passed them.

"What is wrong with her…?" asked Sasuke while I distanced myself from the pair.

_Plenty of things Sasuke… Plenty of things…_

Walking through the compound gates for the second time in my second life, I headed straight to the academy. Normally, a parent or guardian would accompany the new student. However, Shisui's dad couldn't come because of his leg and his mom… She was still grieving...

_Maybe Shisui would have come if I had…_

Before I could finish that train of thought, I bumped into somebody. Raising my head, I was greeted with a face that would be recognizable to any Naruto fan, Kakashi Hatake… Normally I would've been ecstatic, but I couldn't seem to care anymore. "You should watch where you're going…" he said looking down at me.

"Sorry…" I replied in a dead tone, meeting his eyes for just a second before attempting to move past him.

"Who are you?" he asked, shaking me up a bit.

"Akane-" I started, but froze when I realized what I said. To be honest, it was a name that held good memories and bad. I liked it, I preferred it, but I also made me think how I wanted isolate it, to shelter it from this cruel world.

Biting my lip at my most recent slip up, I hastily corrected myself. "Aya, Aya Uchiha… You don't need to remember it." I mumbled not even bothering to make eye contact.

Somehow, that name left an even more bitter taste in my mouth. I've been trying to ignore it, but it felt fake, it always did. But then again, that was Aya in a nutshell, a sham persona. If I'm still the nineteen year old Akane at heart, then did the Aya everyone perceives to be there never really existed in the first place?

Well, I guess she did… Just as an extension _me_, but it was an extension I want to cut away. A part of me I wish never existed in the first place. _Aya_ never seems to bring good, just bad… It was a tag that just attracts trouble. It was always a nagging feeling, Shisui's death just broke the camel's back. Aya was weak, but then again so was Akane. However, Akane didn't need to deal with super ninjas or a coup conspiracy. Akane was normal, Aya is not.

Fortunately, Kakashi didn't seem to notice the grimace I was giving myself, and merely looked at me in the eyes. "Well then Aya, you should lighten up a bit. You look like… a ghost" he said walking away.

A ghost? I guess that would be and fitting comparison. I was invisible to this world… I can't change a thing, just an invisible witness to this cruel joke called life. And in two years, I would fade out of existence…

* * *

**3rd POV**

Was it Akane or Aya? Regardless, who was this strange Uchiha? Questioned Kakashi as he watched the pale girl walk way. From what he knew about the Uchiha's right now, nobody was allowed to enter or leave the compound. She was too young to be a shinobi, so that meant one thing, she was a student at the academy. But why would the clan go out of their way to send _her_ to the academy? It didn't seem like she would last long.

He could see it in the eyes. The girl was dead inside. Merely drifting through life with no goal, waiting for death itself. Kakashi was quite familiar with the sight. It wasn't uncommon to see that look in veteran shinobi, the terminally ill, or most commonly, the ANBU. But to see it in the eyes of a six year old was disturbing. It was just wrong… Pushing aside these thought of the strange Uchiha, Kakashi made his way to the monument stone. He had to make this quick, Itachi and Tenzo were waiting on him.

* * *

(A/N Alright, we're back with are mentally estranged protagonist. Basically, the OC is at the lowest she's ever been. She feels responsible for what happened to Shisui, and it's hitting her hard. Just another condition we can add to the OC's list of mental conditions. Meanwhile, the second half of this chapter continues her ongoing identity crisis. At her core, the OC is still _Akane_. However, after Shisui's death she's begins to view Akane and Aya as two completely separate entities. As to why, it's her version of a self coping mechanism which is all I'm going to say for now, feel free to speculate in the comments. Regardless, this a problem she'll have to deal with it, but won't be resolved fully until the 'second arc'.

As for the dread academy, sorry BlueMapple and Irina Akashira. The OC will be in this go with the flow attitude for a bit. As much as I want the OC to keep fighting, she isn't the type to keep fighting when there's no hope. Well, when there is no hope in her mind at least, all the mental problems isn't helping either. However, the OC is still herself at heart and won't bend to anyones expectations. She'll still follow her own path in life, where ever that road may lead her)

Last edit: January 31, 2020


	10. Chapter 10: SS Itachi 3: Silent Sunshine

**I don't own any of the characters or cover. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto except my own OC and the cover belongs to 月森うさこ****. Please enjoy the story and support the official release…**

* * *

(A/N I'm alive! Sorry for the one month hiatus. School's just been taking up more of my time than I would've liked. I should be able to post more frequently with current world events going on, maybe another chapter in the next few days? Anyhow, today I have a little treat for you all, the third instalment of SS Itachi. You guy got to see how the OC reacted to aftermath of Shisui's death, now it's Itachi's and Izumi's turn. Now let's get this show on the road, more Itachi time!)

* * *

**Chapter 10: SS Itachi 3: ****Silent Sunshine**

**3rd POV**

_Murderer_

That was the only word Itachi Uchiha could hear as he walked through the compound. After recent… events, Itachi had requested a leave of absence from all shinobi duty. It was wrong, shameful for a Uchiha of his position. However, that didn't matter anymore.

Itachi was no longer the heir to the Uchiha clan.

As much as Itachi hated to admit it, his mind kept drawing blanks at that rainy night. His recollection of events was hazy after Shisui's apparent death. He remembered leaning onto Izumi for support, a stain on his supposed stoic image. That and the fact they didn't even bothered trying to sneak back into the compound.

They were both tired, exhausted, drained… The pair, walked straight into an Uchiha patrol. Itachi vaguely remembered an interrogation, the guards bombarded him with questions until his father came. Itachi was too tired to answer questions anyhow that night. The look Fugaku gave Itachi was one of disappointment, surprisingly he didn't denounce Itachi's claim to the clan right then and there.

As Fugaku and his eldest son walked home, Itachi suspected his treatment was lighter than most, considering he saw one of the guard's slap Izumi across the cheek through the small window of the guardhouse. That made his blood boil, but Itachi dutifully maintained his pokerface, as hard as it was.

The next morning, Itachi was technically placed under house arrest. Did he care? Not in the slightest. Unfortunately, it was this insubordination that would lead to his downfall. Stealthily avoiding the guards placed around him, Itachi made his way to Shisui's house. The clan likely didn't know of Shisui's fate, but Itachi felt his family at the very least had the right to know.

Arriving at his best friend's house, he was welcomed with open arms. That welcoming atmosphere didn't last however… He had the entirety of Shisui's family gather in their dining room, even young Aya. Her eyes were hollow and dead, still Itachi made it a point to keep an eye on the girl. Despite Shisui's statement that night, Itachi didn't know if Aya truly had no knowledge of the coup. However, it seems his fears were unfounded as it truly seemed Aya memories of that night were foggy at best. That, and the fact she utterly broke down into a sobbing mess after explaining Shisui's fate. Itachi remember being slammed against the wall by Shisui's father and yelled at by his mother… Aya? She just stayed silent.

The situation quickly escalated, vulgar words were throw around haphazardly. It wasn't long before the patriarch clobbered Itachi across the face, screaming that he was a disgrace. However, the thing that broke Itachi was the bitter comment thrown towards his loved ones. Itachi couldn't care about his reputation anymore, it was done for, he realized that. However, his family certainly weren't traitors and Izumi definitely wasn't a whore. In the moment, Itachi probably didn't even realize he struck back, eyes full of murderous intent. Looking back on it, Itachi wished Aya wasn't around for the conversation. It was childish, shameful…

Apparently, they caused enough of a commotion that the Konoha Police Force was called in, leading to a not so welcomed confrontation with his father. As Itachi was dragged away by Fugaku, Shisui's family was screaming at him to high heaven.

In a way, that was where the rumours started, the one where people speculated he and Izumi killed his best friend. In Itachi's mind, it was utterly preposterous. Unfortunately, the elders disagreed… The rumour spreaded like a wildfire, engulfing the compound in a mere twenty four hours. It was at this point, Itachi was called too Fugaku's office. It was there he was denounced and Izumi's family further disgraced… Itachi looked around the room for Izumi, but she was nowhere to be found. In her stead was Hazuki, who just gave him this disappointed stare.

To this day, Itachi could find it in him to care about his denouncement. Despite being good at it, Itachi never quite cared for politics. In his mind, politics were a ruthless war of words, one more dark than actual combat itself. Still, it was a necessary evil, Itachi knew this. He wasn't even mad at his father. It was the sensible thing to do. However, it seemed like sensible didn't mean right. What stung, was the fact he was being denounced for baseless rumours that slandered his, Izumi's, and Shisui's names.

* * *

Today, was Shisui's funeral. He gone to Izumi's place to invite her, but Hazuki closed the door on him upon seeing his face. "I-I'm sorry Itachi-sama, but my family would like to be left alone for now"

It unfortunately seemed that even the people closest to him believed in the lies…

Walking to the cemetery, he was about to exit the compound before he was stopped by two bulky looking Uchiha. Itachi's eyes immediately narrowed recognizing them as the ones who harmed Izumi. "Where do you think your going Murderer-_sama_?" asked the first guard sarcastically.

"I am simply going to the funeral to pay my respects" answered Itachi cooly, hiding growing irritation.

"Sorry, we're under strict order not to let you pass. You're under house arrest remember? Can't have you breaking any more rules now" mocked the second guard.

"I believe those order have been rescinded after my denouncement, father believed that was enough punishment" stated Itachi, looking around that the growing crowd.

"Of course, my mistake. We just had your little girl friend pay your dues instead. We can't let the power get to you head now, can we?" scowled the first guard.

Upon hearing Izumi's name, Itachi let off palatable waves of killer intent. Pay _his _dues? What did that even mean! Itachi hadn't been able to see Izumi since their return, but if these guards did more than just touch her… Itachi didn't even want to think about it. Regardless, he was itching to tear them a new one, but restrained himself.

"Yeah, she gave us some good company. Shame, we had to let her go yesterday. Made her squeak until she couldn't squeak any longer-" started the second guard, but Itachi gave him a good left hook before sending his friend flying with a kick.

Realizing what he had done, Itachi clenched his fists before exhaling slowly. Composing himself, he dusted off his clothes before apologizing to the greater crowd. After a short bow, Itachi left the compound towards the village cemetery.

* * *

Walking through the large cemetery gate, he made his way to the Uchiha portion of the graveyard. There, he found the closer members of Shisui's family gathering around for his funeral, all of their expressions were somber at best. Seeing all the pain in their eyes, especially Aya's, made Itachi once again wonder why Shuisui jumped. It made Itachi slightly disappointed towards his old friend, but knew it was not good to think ill of the dead.

Today, was a day of remembrance, not one of pointing fingers. Not that it mattered, all the fingers were pointed at him anyhow. Well, him and Izumi… He just had to find and talk things out with her. This was his mess and he got Izumi involved in it. No. Perhaps Izumi _didn't _want to see him, and was intentionally avoiding him. It was quite plausible, Hazuki herself admitted this.

Letting out a sigh, Itachi walked away from the funeral and further into the cemetery. Given recent events, it would be best if he didn't show his face and did his own mourning in solitude. Sauntering down the path, Itachi was surprised to find the person he was just thinking about sitting on a bench.

"Izumi…" whispered Itachi as he caught the girl's attention.

She was wearing the traditional high collared Uchiha garb, and the headband she normally displayed proudly was nowhere to be seen. Izumi looked miserable, and Itachi knew it was his actions to blame. His guilt only compounded when he saw her black eye and several distinct handprints around her throat, likely caused by asphyxiation.

Noticing Itachi's eyes gazing at her neck, she raised her collar and turned away slightly. Raising her hand, Izumi slowly and clumsily spelt out something in traditional Konoha hand signs, a skill every shinobi was taught at the academy. _"Hey Itachi…"_

"Izumi I…" started Itachi, but stopped when Izumi started gesturing again.

"_Want a seat?"_ she asked, scooting over a bit on the bench.

Wincing a bit, Itachi hesitantly sat down on the bench. There was a moment of silence between the two before Itachi spoke up. "I am sorry. If you have anything you want to say to me, please… I wholeheartedly deserve it" apologized Itachi, not being able to look Izumi in the eyes.

Itachi waited for harsh words to descend, but none came. Instead, a reassuring hand rested on his thigh. Looking at Izumi, she shook her head was a sad smile.

"Do you not have anything to say to me! I have shamed your family, ruined your reputation. Even your own mother can't bare to look me in the eyes. So, why aren't you saying anything! You should be yelling at me, screaming even… Why? Its illogical…" whispered Itachi in a rare show of emotion, causing Izumi to flinch.

It was at this point Izumi began to tear up. Thinking it was his fault, Itachi tried to move away but Izumi refuse to remove herself from his thigh. Using her remain hand, she wiped away her tears in between hand signs. _"I can't Itachi... My voice. It's gone, t-those guards took it away. When the village found out, they revoked my ninja license because I wouldn't be able to prefarm. I-It's painful to brewth sometimes… I'll nevr be a ninya… My dweams…"_ gestured the girl, her movements becoming more and more sloppy before she couldn't continue any longer, her face filling up with tears.

Itachi, was speechless. Izumi, the bright, cheerful, energetic girl he heard speaking a few nights ago was no more. Her _voice _was no more, Izumi Uchiha was now mute. However, more importantly to the girl herself, she wasn't a ninja anymore… He licence was revoked, kicked out of her Genin team, likely never to become a shinobi ever again.

Itachi knew, with a donor and enough skill, almost any organ could be healed and if needed, replaced. Itachi has even seen ninja blinded in combat return to active duty with enough time. However, the voice was not something that could be replaced so easily, and Itachi doubted there was anyone who cared enough about Izumi to make the effort.

Without a voice, she could not communicate. If she could not communicate, she was a liability. And every enemy shinobi knew to exploit liabilities. He briefly pondered if maybe Izumi could remain in serves by preforming solo missions. However, Itachi and Izumi both knew she wasn't skilled enough for such tasks, she was in the end a mere Genin. Itachi knew it was crushing for the girl, yet at the same time saw the logic behind such a decision.

It was the first time in a long time Itachi cursed his intelligence. He knew Izumi's dream, she told him herself. To protect those who can't protect themselves. It was pure, innocent, fool hearty even. In Itachi's mind, her dream was impossible, but in the back of even his mind he thought it was a goal worth fighting for. Now, that dream really was impossible, as Izumi was casted out of her clan and the village she held so dear. Worse, it was partially his fault.

Lightly removing the girls hand, he kowtowed himself before her. It was disgraceful, dishonourable, shameful to be doing such a thing. However, how else could he even begin to atone for this? He had ripped away a dream, Izumi's entire livelihood. Something like that, could simply not be replaced. "I am sorry, ashamed even. No words can compare to how I regret my actions" stated Itachi, forehead against the ground.

However, as he looked up to gauge her reaction, Itachi got a good slap in the face. Flabbergasted, Itachi cradled his cheek before looking at an angry tearstained Izumi. _"You idiot! Don't regret a thing! Don't regret going after your friend! Don't regret standing up for your family! And certainly don't regret bringing me along, because _this_ isn't your fault! I lost my voice standing up for _you_. No one believed you didn't kill Shisui. Well, I did! It was my fault for fighting back, and I don't regret it"_ gestured Izumi slowly, her movements forceful yet composed. _"I-If you really _do_ regret you actions, then my voice really was sacrificed in vain!"_

"Izumi… I-" murmured Itachi, as Izumi pulled him back onto the bench.

"_If you want to help me… Then help me get stronger. I-I don't want to give up. I want to prove our clan wrong. You are no traitor and I'm not your- whatever the clan sees me as!" _signalled Izumi before clasping Itachi's hand in hers.

The look in her eyes was one of loss, but not of regret. Itachi could at the very least see that. There was a renewed determination inside her, a drive and stubbornness only Izumi could possess. He could tell Izumi was still hurt, very much so. No one could recover from such a life changing event so quickly. However, they both knew dawdling around wouldn't help her heal. As they say, time heals all wounds. However, time can only move forward once they look past the present and toward the future.

"Very well, if that is what you desire then I will help to the best of my ability. You are correct, we cannot let these lies persist. Together, we'll clear our names and avenge your lose" stated Itachi, drifting back into his monotone voice.

However, Izumi could see the determination in Itachi's eyes. Smiling, the girl jumped Itachi, giving him a hug. Itachi, being so close had no time to avoid it, and thus was subject to Izumi platonic affection. Realizing her action, Izumi blushed and quickly retracted her arms before standing up.

"_T-Thank you Itachi-kun… I should probably go see mom now, she must be worried slick. I mean sick! Mom must be worried sick!" _Izumi gestured at lighting speed, her cheeks still dusted pink. _"I'll see you at one of the training grounds soon, right?"_

Giving a confirming nod, Izumi blushed a bit before leaving with a smile across her face. Meanwhile, Itachi tried to process what just happened. Izumi hugged him. The only person who could hug him was Sasuke! Normally, whenever a girl tried to touch him he'd feel sick to his stomach. However, somehow, this time it didn't feel wrong.

Unfortunately, Itachi wouldn't be able to dwell upon it for much longer as he suddenly felt another presence beside him.

"Hello Itachi-niisan…"

* * *

(A/N Izumi is mute! _*dramatic sarcasm*_ Oh, the horror! Well, at least she isn't dead yet. Jokes aside, yeah I did make Izumi mute. Why? Because I wanted Itachi to feel the weight of his actions go beyond his own person. A cheap shot, I know but I _need_ to get their relationship rolling somehow. Speaking of relationship? How am I doing with it? Don't know why, but it feels kind of rushed to me and I'm the person writing it!

Anyhow, I do also want you guys to honestly tell me how I'm doing with Izumi's and Itachi's character individually. Itachi, like the OC is racked with guilt and is properly confused. Unlike the anime, he wasn't given straight forward instructions by Shisui and hopefully Izumi being around will make sure he doesn't do anything stupid. Izumi, I wanted her to be the bright ray of sunshine for the story, at least for now. Currently, every major player in the story is entering a downward spiral (thanks Shisui). However, Izumi is the least affected by it because she never had any personal connections to guilt bomb. Still, it doesn't mean she isn't fighting her own demons. The loss of her voice will greatly affect Izumi and Itachi for many chapters to come, lets just say she's good at hiding the pain...)

Last edit: March 17, 2020


	11. Chapter 11: Edurence?

**I don't own any of the characters or cover. All characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto except my own OC and the cover belongs to 月森うさこ****. Please enjoy the story and support the official release…**

* * *

(A/N Is a week considered a few days? No? Well, sorry... I kinda got sidetracked with tons of reading. Anyhow, this time week finally get to the academy. Honestly, I don't like the first half of this chapter. I think it was 2AM sometime during Christmas break I wrote the bulk of this mess, and I don't know what the hell I was thinking. Aya's interactions feel kind of forced and the nameless students have no depth, but this is also the one time I get to summarize Aya's mental state. So between scrapping this chapter and keeping it in, I'm keeping it in. This time around I'll be addressing comments at the end, happy reading. Warning, Code Geass feels)

* * *

**Chapter 11: Edurence or Escape? **

**Normal POV**

"Good morning class, today we have a new student joining us" stated Iruka to the class of academy students. "Come in, introduce yourself"

Hearing the signal to enter, Aya dragged herself into the classroom. Standing in front of the class, there were murmurs going around the class. She was dressed in a black blouse with the Uchiha fan plastered on the back and a red pleated skirt, pretty standard. However, what made the class gasped was the state she appeared in. Her clothes were crumpled, waist long raven hair a disaster, and even her onyx eyes where hollow and devoid of emotion. The class began to wonder how Aya's parents allowed her to represent her clan like that, it was a stain on the noble Uchiha name.

The girl looked like death itself.

"Recently, she's had some family trouble. That's why she is joining us later than normal…" explained Iruka while the class just nodded along. "Go on, introduce yourself."

Nodding at Iruka, Aya turned her attention to the class, head still down. "My name is…" mumbled the girl, barely audible.

A few kids, leaned forward hoping the girl would repeat herself. However, the only thing that followed was dead silence.

"I don't think many people caught that. C-could you perhaps repeat that? Maybe a little louder too" requested Iruka, leaning into the girl's ear so the other children couldn't hear.

Nodding, Aya droned out the same words she just uttered moments ago, this time in a louder voice. "My name is… Aya Uchiha…" the girl repeated much to the disappointment of many.

"That's it…?" asked Iruka, taken aback a bit by the girl's lacklustre answer.

Aya shifted her head slightly, and murmured something else. This time, what she whispered was definitely inaudible.

Thinking the girl was a bit confused, the teacher once again leaned in close for an explanation. "Normally students tell each other their favourite hobby, likes, dislikes, fears, future professions, dreams, idols… It helps the students connect with each other through similar interests." whispered the teacher trying to get her to open up.

Nodding slightly, Iruka confirmed that Aya acknowledged his words and stepped back. "Hobbies…? I guess I read a lot" said Aya.

"What's your favourite book?!" asked one of the students, raising his hand up high.

"I guess the tamer novels of the Icha Icha series… I tend to favour the romance genre. But my favourite book outside it would be Tale of the Utterly Gutsy Shinobi… A good read" explained the six year old girl with a small smile.

However, her explanation caused Iruka to go red, which got confused looks from the students. "T-Then what about your likes?" stuttered Iruka, coughing into his hand awkwardly, too flustered to lecture the girl.

"Reading, calligraphy, drawing… I'm not an outdoors person. My bro- family always tried to get me outside though…" replied Aya with a hint of sadness.

"What about your dislike?" questioned another student.

Aya eyes widened a bit, clenching her fists in the process. "Dislikes… There are plenty of things I dislike… I dislike my clan, the world, the blood… t-the death… But, I dislike myself-" rambled the girl relaxing her fingers, as if realizing how insignificant she was.

However, the slight action went unnoticed by the crowd as they focused more on the words falling out of her mouth. There was only one thought forming in the minds of everyone in the room, this girl was crazy…

Soon enough, Iruka place a reassuring hand on Aya's shoulder silencing her. "You can stop now… Do you have a fear you would like to share? It's not necessary, some are uncomfortable…" started Iruka feeling like he was talking to a machine.

In all honesty, Iruka wanted to give the girl some time to breath. She looked… out of it, to put it nicely. Answering for the sake of answering, like she didn't even notice the twenty some odd students in front of her. And just like an answering machine, Aya responded in a dead tone. "…I'm scared of death... But I'm more scared of killing anyone else I care about…" muttered Aya staring at her hand as if soaked in blood, causing morbid looks to appear in the class.

Words like psycho and maniac, flew around the crowd. However, Aya seemed unfazed. That or she couldn't even hear them in her daze.

That was it, Iruka needed to take this girl to the hospital. What were the Uchiha doing to their children? If this was one of their two best, something was obviously wrong. He needed to see the Hokage about this. However, just as he was about to guide Aya to the Hokage's office upstairs, someone decided to continue with the questions.

"What about your future…? You plan on killing anyone else? Cause I'm sure you could with your looks right now" joked one of the female students, and that got a light chuckle from the rest of the class. Admittedly, it did break the tension but it left a bad taste in Iruka's mouth, he was going to need a little chat with them later.

Unfortunately, before he could lead Aya out the door, the ticking time bomb opened her mouth once more. "I wanted to be a housewife… Have children, grow old… and-" answered Aya, much to the relief of Iruka. For once, the girl gave a somewhat normal answer. However, that feeling of euphoria wasn't reciprocated by the children, especially the boys. They just gagged at the prospect of marriage. Still, it gave the teacher hope that this introduction could still be salvaged.

"Eww, are your dreams as girly as that?" gagged one of the boys.

For the first time since she entered the room, Aya raised her head to look everyone in the eyes. However, it didn't have the effect Aya wanted. Staring into the dull endless abyss of her eyes frightened the children, causing a couple to back away. "I want to be standing in this room in two years with the rest of you…" said Aya with a sad smile on her face knowing it was an impossible dream.

"W-what about your idol…" asked another student, seeing that their teacher didn't seem to be doing his job.

"I-idol?"

"Someone you hold in high esteem. Someone you wish to be like" sighed Iruka, not seeing how this could get any worse. The introduction was already over and he had given up stopping it. The door may have been a few feet away, but touching the girl now seemed like a horrible idea.

"Idol… He taught me many things I didn't really want to learn… But he was a kind, blunt, devoted, compassionate, easy to talk too," described Aya starting to tearing up.

"He was open minded too and always put the village first. He valued peace and followed the will of fire. He was everything I'm not… And I killed him. I let him die! I should have stopped him, but I couldn't!" cried the girl breaking down in front of the class.

Iruka was wrong, it could got worse. In fact, it just did. First he was given the task of teaching the nine tailed fox and now this train wreck… What was he going to do?

* * *

**_1 month later_**

It was recess, and guess where I was? Outside on the iconic swing hanging from the tree. I recovered from my breakdown earlier in the year, but it left a lasting impression. Nobody would wanted to be associated with the girl who had a mental breakdown on the first day of school. Honestly, I don't know what happened that day. It was like every time I answered a question, I was just digging myself deeper into a sense of self loathing as I realized how flawed I am.

_Who am I kidding, flawed is my middle name…_

That, compounded with the daily beatings I now get, makes my life feel extra miserable. Touching my left cheek, I instantly retracted my prodding finger.

_Yep, definitely bruised_

If I was still _there_ I wouldn't be dealing with this domestic violence, but somehow I guess I grew accustomed to it here. I knew it was wrong, but what could _I _do? Still, I wonder if Shisui's dad really felt like violence was the answer? Well, I guess he did cause the beatings haven't stopped he learned about my failing grades.

Maybe, I should try harder? If so, for what? There's no pay off to _any_ of this. This _life_ had no pay off since I was dropped here. Yeah, there wasn't really a payoff on earth either, but I had a life there, a spot in society, I was happy, and that was enough for me. Here? I had _nothing_. Well, I had Shi- my new brother, but I blew that.. So what's left? My now abusive household, egotistical clan members, mass murdering neighbour?

Who knows, maybe Shisui's dad will kill me before Itachi does… It's like a competition, 'who'll end Akane first?' But wouldn't that just be pathetic, a reincarnate being killed by her new family. Well, it's not that I really considered them family in the first place. Maybe this was karma for killing Shisui? Yeah, that must be it… Regardless, I would be the laughingstock of reincarnates everywhere! Still, if me being pathetic is what will get me out of this hellhole so be it…

_But will death really get you out Akane? Maybe you'll start back at square one?_

Look, if someone was to take a picture of me right now, I would've probably looked like Naruto during the opening sequence of the first ending. I remember watching that moment for the first time on my tv screen. Naruto, swinging all by his lonesome, watching the other students from afar. My initial reaction for the poor boy was pity.

_But oh have the tables been turned…_

I was no longer watching the life of a six year old blond, nor was I sitting on my comfy couch in the living room. I was here… Living in my new reality. So what would I think about my current situation if I was still sheltered from all this? Would it be pity? Perhaps disgust? Or maybe some empathy?

"Miss misery…?" said a quiet voice breaking me out of my daydream.

Regaining my sense of reality, I ironically found Naruto standing before me. "That's not my name..." I sighed curtly.

"But that's what everyone else calls you" whimpered Naruto, and I instantly felt a tinge of memorse.

"How about this, I'll call you Naruto and you'll call me Ak-Aya" I responded, turning my head away in guilt.

After I said this, there was just an awkward silence between the two of us. I half expected him to just ignore me like everyone else. But then again, he himself was in a similar situation. Perhaps this was a moment of empathy or maybe even camaraderie, I couldn't be bothered to think too deeply.

Still, it didn't change the dead silent atmosphere. Was this really the same boisterous Naruto the anime portrayed him to be? Well, I guess this was before his prankster days so maybe… I guess it was interesting in a way, I'm talking Naruto Uzumaki. A very depressed Naruto Uzumaki, but Naruto nonetheless. Any Naruto fan would _kil_\- love, to be in my position right now. Me? You could be hard pressed to call me a fan at all anymore, I wanted out.

_Do you really Akane?_

"Uhm… Do you want this seat?" I asked getting up from the swing.

"No, I was wondering what you were doing" said Naruto taking a seat beside me on the dirt floor.

_Oh really?_

"Not much, what were you doing?" I retorted sitting back down, perhaps with a bit too much sass. In fact, I still couldn't believe I said it myself. If I was in Japan right now, I would've been apologizing right about now. In a way, this world has been changing me way too much…

Actually, no, that wasn't true. I was always like this, Japan just let me put on a mask to hide all my imperfections. Unfortunately for me, I liked that mask, it insured a sense of mental and social security. To know if I stepped outside into the city, everyone else around me would have their own mask of social expectations. But here, in this Naruto world, that mask has been ripped away…

A part of _Akane_ was ripped away…

So here is the million yen question, do I build up a new mask? If so, what would that mask be built upon? In Japan that mask was built on social norms and acceptance, a politeness and sense of morality everyone was expected to have. If that was the case, would the mask I build here be one of murder and blood?

I could deny it all I want, the economy here was literally paved in blood. I hated that, I wanted to avoid the bloodshed, it went against everything I knew growing up, but that was also the social norm in this world.

Coming full circle, do I take a new mask or let my personality run free? Was showing my true colours really what I want to do? Colours shunned by society in Japan and myself. In truth, I don't know. Would abandoning everything I knew actually be for the best? I mean, I already got one person killed because of my selfishness, my desires, my _true_ colours. But if I did discard all those things that made me _me_, who I am anymore… _Akane_, or something else entirely. Would I finally be consumed by the irrationality of this world, by _Aya_? Before I could finish my soliloquy, Naruto spoke up.

"Nobody wants to talk to me…" he said solemnly, ignoring my sassy tone.

"Nobody?" I echoed and he shook his head.

I was quite shocked by this information. I knew parents would try to get their kids to stay away from Naruto, but it has only been a month! One month! And from what I could remember, Naruto hasn't even done anything yet. No pranks, no shenanigans, nothing…

"Shikamaru?" I asked, hoping someone would have talked to him.

"No…" he replied.

"Choji?"

Again he shook his head.

"Hinata…?" I questioned now gripping the rope suspending the swing.

If Hinata, the girl who had a literal crush on the boy didn't speak up when he was in this sorry state, it would be pointless looking elsewhere for comfort.

"She talked to me a bit for the first week… But then she stopped" said Naruto looking more distraught by the second.

_Those damn parents act way to fast…_

This, this was just despicable. With each name spoken, I could feel my heart drop. I knew some parents would tell their children to avoid Naruto, but this was ridiculous. _This_ is how prejudice and discrimination is passed down through generations! Children don't ask questions, they just do as they're told and I'm well versed in it as an experienced social hate target.

However, I was old enough to understand _why_. Were the reasons pretty stupid and technically my fault? Well, maybe you could say that. But when you see a completely innocent _child_ who doesn't know any better, ask why people are avoiding him like the plague… It really makes you question the morality of the world around you.

A scowl unconsciously formed on my face as I tightened my grip further, only realizing my action when Naruto shrunk back. Letting go of the swing, I turned to Naruto with a weak smile. "It's not all bad… I'm talking to you aren't I?" I said with as much bravado as I could muster.

In reality, I wasn't much better off than Naruto himself. However, at least I wasn't a six year old child going through his discrimination. I was no psychologist, but this couldn't be healthy for a growing child. I was twenty-five and I was crumbling mentally. I wouldn't even try to deny it. My earlier breakdown was more than enough evidence for me. I couldn't even imagine going through this as a child.

Turning his head towards me, I saw a slight glimmer of happiness in his eyes. In a weird way it brought me joy that I was able to help this boy. It made me feel like I at least did _something _with my existence, even if it was just a little.

However, it also crushed me a bit inside. Logically speaking, no matter how much I wished it and no matter how much he wished it, I couldn't always be there for him. I could keep him grounded for now but what would happen after if died? Would he enter a downward spiral like I did? Would he feel guilty for my death? No, our situations are different… Too different. Besides, no one would mourn me, because who would mourn the sick mentally retarded kid called Aya. Maybe I should save Naruto the trouble of dealing with me and just walk away…

But… That look in his eyes kept circulating through my mind, a look full of misplaced hope. There was still that lingering joy that I didn't want to disappear, even if I knew it would be better for the both of us if it did.

"Hey, do you want to be friends?" I prompted.

"Really?" asked Naruto and I could practically hear the joy in his voice.

"Yeah…" I replied, giving the first genuine smile in what seemed like forever.

I knew it was selfish, that it may destroy Naruto in the future. But in this moment I couldn't seem to care… In my head I was berating myself, calling myself a selfish idiot. However, there was still the small bit of joy knowing, at least for now, Naruto wouldn't be alone.

"Hey, want to get some Ichiraku later? My treat" asked, jumping off the swing.

"Y-yeah! How did you know I loved Ichiraku?!" exclaimed Naruto, his body full of pumped up excitement.

"That's for me to know and you to eternally wonder about~" I sang, lightly poking the soup stain on his shirt.

"Oh... Come on" pouted Naruto, and was admittedly pretty cute.

"Nu-uh. Now, let's get back to class"

"Fine, I'll race you to the door!" laughed Naruto running off.

Blinking for a second, it wasn't a moment later before I gave chase. Before Naruto knew it, I was running beside him as he gave me a toothy grin. I sighed, but responded with a light smile before speeding up. Was cheating with Chakra wrong? Who knew, I was having fun. _Fun_? Huh, I guess I was having fun… I felt happy, joyous, possibly even _alive_…

_Maybe… Just maybe, dying isn't the only way out…_

* * *

(A/N So... Did the OC recover too quickly? I don't know if you guys noticed but I'm aiming for her to cover all the stages of grief. She's already gone through denial when she looked around the forest, anger when she berated herself, bargaining when she blamed herself for Shisui's death, and now she's entered and exited full blown depression. Honestly, I didn't originally have that Ichiraku scene in the draft. However, I felt the OC would've felt too manipulative and selfish if I just ended it at the friends part. Speaking of friends, Naruto appears! So, like every other character, I need to ask how I did with his character? He'll pop up every now and again, but he isn't the main focus. As much it'll piss people off, at _this point_ in the story he's a plot device, sorry. He'll get development after the OC leaves, but not now.

Now, comment time. Irina Akashira, once again, thank you for pointing out plot holes. Yeah, I kinda skimmed over the rest of the Uchiha clan to focus on Izumi and Itachi. The scapegoat idea is interesting and I may employ it. Regardless, Itachi will be doling out some vigilante justice in the near future. Whether I'll be writing it out or mentioning it off handedly remains to be scene. However, he won't be committing mass genocide on the remnants of the Uchiha rebellion. Sorry, I Judicator, but even with the crippling of Izumi, I feel Itachi will be able to rationally move past the incident. He won't be doing any clan killing unless Danzo gets his hands on him.

Okay, that's it. Sorry for the long author's note. I just had a lot of things to say. I did want to briefly talk about how the OC is losing her sense of morality, but this A/N is long enough! And yes, the OC does read smut. Give her some slack, she's 25ish)

Last edit: March 28, 2020


End file.
